Sweet Caroline

#33 Do you want to be...?

"She did what?" I ask, my voice shrill. "I didn't know that!"

He grabs his phone from the table and shows me the text: Get your ass over here, Nathanial Storm. My friend deserves better than just the occasional booty call. Make her feel as special as she is. If you don't, I'm gonna tell her she's right to doubt you and find her a nice young guy to hook up with.

Yeah, that's Shaughna alright. I can also see Nathan's response: Give me the address.

"Gotta love Shaughna." I shake my head.

"She's definitely a good friend," he agrees. "I like her. Did I understand correctly that she's now dating your ex?"

"Yeah, Dshawn. She was so worried to tell me they hooked up." It feels like a million years ago instead of just yesterday.

"How do you feel about that?" As always, he's studying my reaction intensely.

"I don't care," I say with a smile.

"Isn't that a violation of girl code or something?" he presses.

I shrug. "I never loved Dshawn. We only dated for a few months, four years ago. And we hooked up twice the past few months, but only because I was trying to forget about you. Who am I to keep Shaughna from dating him? Besides..." I grab his hand and squeeze. "I've got you, don't I? Why would I care what any of my exes are doing when I'm perfectly happy starting something new?"

"Caroline..." Nathan takes a deep breath, almost like he's trying to find some courage. "Are we... I mean... Do you want to be...?"

"Exclusive?" I finish for him. "I'm pretty sure that we already are. I'm sorry that I slept with other people before, but we-"

"No, no," he says quickly. "You don't need to apologize for that. I told you that we were nothing more than a fling and that I wasn't looking for a relationship. You were just trying to move on so you wouldn't lose your job. I totally get it. That's not what I wanted to ask."

"Oh." Is he really going to say what I think he's trying to say?

"I know that I'm a little old for a title like boyfriend, but I'd very much like to call you my girlfriend." He's so cute when he's nervous. When I don't answer right away, he sips his wine, trying to look like he isn't waiting for my response.

"Yes," I say with a smile. "I'd love that."

"Thank God," he mutters, pulling me against him so he can kiss me. "You had me shitting bricks there for a moment."

"Does this mean..." I hesitate. "What does that mean for us? I mean, obviously we're not gonna go a week without talking ever again. I get that you can't come over when you've got Rose for the week, but I want to at least text or call a few times during the week. I can't keep wondering what's going on with us for days on end."

"Of course," he agrees immediately. "Same goes for me."

"It doesn't really change anything else, though, does it?" This makes me a little sad, honestly. "We still can't tell anyone. I mean, I'm serious about seeing where this goes, but we're only starting to figure out how to communicate properly. I don't mean to sound like a bitch, but I'm not gonna walk through the streets hand in hand with you. I'd lose my job. And that would mean me moving back in with my parents again. I can't go back to that."

"Of course not." Nathan isn't surprised by my words, luckily. "I'm still in awe of the fact that you're willing to take the risk of more people finding out. It's bad enough that John and Tiffany know. I would never ask you to put your job on the line for me. We've got all the time in the world. Let's just try to make it to the summer break."