Reality Check

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I looked back and forth at two bright pink squished little faces that were fast asleep. The baby on my left had a pink hat on and the baby on the right had a blue one, and they both had paper tags with just the last name Alderson and the date 04-24-2020 on their ankles. I teared up again as, after all this time, they're finally here.

"Look, Baby, that's your siblings." I held him up a bit higher so he could see.

"That's your sister." I held him up to the left.

"And that's your brother." I moved him to the right.

I kinda sniffled all the while he stared somewhat intrigued but ultimately didn't understand. It doesn't matter; they're here.

Darlene took Alex from me and I slipped one of my hands into the incubator on the right. I reached in and held his hand, it's so small, it's a wide as two of my fingers. I took my hand out and reached into the incubator on the left, I had barely touched her skin when she wrapped three of her fingers around my index.

My heart chocked, I never realized how much they mean to me until now, and it hurts all the more to see them in these glass cases - it's exactly what I had feared.

"We're planning on taking her out, around six, tonight, the boy has to stay in there for another day at least."

Layla always says the right things at the right time, it's almost as if she can read my mind.

"It turns out he was developing a little bit slower than she was so his lungs weren't quite as good as we wanted them to be."

"Then why is she here?"

"She needs the heat, neither of them can really properly regulate body temperature yet."

I wheeled myself away from them in the direction of the door.

"Don't be sad, Elliot, they're not here for anything major, this is the equivalent to you having had given birth a day later. You gave them so much to work with, they're perfectly healthy."

A day later... a day later and they wouldn't have to be here.

                                                             ***

Once we had gotten back to my room I got to see their paperwork, the girl was born at 2:20AM and weighs 5.7 ounces, and the boy at 03:08AM at 5.3 ounces, making him 48 minutes younger, I can already tell he'll never hear the end of it. Sometime past 2PM they finally let me walk, not before evaluating if I was walking well enough beforehand, now I have to walk with a cane for a couple of days otherwise they won't let me go.

Darlene took Baby out for a walk, I'm sure he wasn't too fond of staying here cooped up for so long, I don't know when she'll be back, honestly. Given no one was watching my back, and I could finally walk, I went back up, to the NICU. I stood there behind the windowpane, looking at them; thunder raging on outside the window. I don't think it ever stopped raining since yesterday.

I guess it doesn't look as bad as I had imagined but seeing them confined like this hurts anyway.

"You really love these kids don't you?" Mr.Robot stood beside me.

I didn't answer, I don't need to, he knows it.

"You sure did prove me something."

"What?"

"You're nothing, like your parents."

I looked at him, not really understanding what he meant.

"You know... When all of this started I was mad at you, I was angry. How could you just cast aside what had happened and willingly do this again? But then I realized, this wasn't about that - you see, kiddo - as soon as you started plotting this, I knew you weren't thinking, you forgot how you got here in the first place."