The world keeps spinning • posie one-shot

All the things

Out of all the things I loved about you, there were still a handful that I hated.

I loved the day we first met. The first day after summer break, I was so excited to go back to school and learn new things. The entire morning I was all giddy, but when I saw you my breath hitched in the back of my throat. The sensation of your piercing eyes and the way the hazel color they had seemed so stunning in the morning sun. You instantly were a thorn in Lizzies side, but as soon as you smiled at me, my knees got weak at your chubby cheeks and your freckles. I was only 13 back then, not being able to understand the tingly feeling in the my stomach or why my cheeks turned a hot red color whenever you smiled at me. We were so young.

I loved how it took us no time at all to become friends. I still remember the way my heart beat so much faster when you came up to me during lunch. You complimented me succeeding on trying a new spell in class earlier and for the first time, you made me feel seen.

I loved that as soon as the teacher announced that we'd have to work in pairs, your eyes instantly fell on me. M.G. was a bit annoyed, but as soon as I looked at him, he understood. He also understood why I couldn't say no to any dumb idea you had, even if it meant going out of my comfort zone. We often got in trouble for breaking the rules, but having a dad that's your own principle always had it's perks.

I loved the necklace you got me for my 14th birthday. I didn't understand what the tiny mirror stood for, but as soon as you explained it to me, I felt my heart beat faster. Whenever you're not sure about something, Jojo, just look in the mirror and remember who you are. You're so much more than just somebody's shadow.
It was also the first time you used your new nickname for me and even though I never told you, the sound of it was something that held a special place in my heart.

I loved the adventures you took me on, even if it meant getting up in the middle of the night and sneaking out. You showed me what being free felt like. Lizzie got on my nerves because of our daily rendezvous, but as soon as one ended I couldn't help but be impatient for the next one. M.G. mocked me for not being able to shut up about you, but he once said that I looked at you the way he looks at Lizzie. He never mentioned it again, but I thought about it a lot. Everything was so confusing back then.

I loved the first time I made you blush. You were always the witty one, but when Lizzie told us „get a room, losers." because she couldn't stand us being all giggly. When I told her „I wouldn't mind." I saw your cheeks redden in the dim light of the kitchen. I think I replayed it in my head a thousand times. Making Penelope Park blush was one of my favorite sights since that day.

I loved how everyone knew what was going on between us but we didn't. As soon as something happened, I ran to M.G. to tell him and you ran to Hope. They were both so tired of our back and forth. We were both so oblivious to the fact that we were slowly falling in love. I slowly burned for you, the flame growing spreading through my body like a wildfire and on some days it became so unbearable that I almost told you everything.

I loved how every time we sat next to each other, our bodies commonly gravitated towards the other and we somewhat always touched. Knees, arms or hands brushing, the feeling of you being next to me made me feel warm. I always wondered if you could hear my heartbeat, because it rang so loudly in my ears whenever we sat like that.

I loved how you first asked me out. It was the first time I saw Penelope Park shy and awkward. I can't  help but chuckle at the memory every time I think about it.
We sat in your room because you invited me over to watch a movie. We didn't spent our usual time to pick one, you just clicked on something that looked acceptable. Halfway through the horrible movie you suddenly sat up and clicked pause. I heard your long sigh. "Is something wrong?", I asked. I never told you, but I was so afraid in that moment. Afraid, that you found out how I really felt about you. That this was the moment you would end our friendship, telling me that you did not feel the same way about me. I prepared for the worst. I noticed how your eyes never met mine. "Can I ask you something, Jojo?", you asked, fiddling with your fingers. "Mhm" I murmured, because the lump in my throat wouldn't have made it possible to actually speak. "I wondered..maybe..if I-, you know, I could take you out?", you said and the way you stuttered made my heart flutter. Everything in that moment made my heart flutter. "Like on a date?", you added and I couldn't contain my massive grin. And for the first time that night, you looked directly into my eyes. "I would really like that, Pen." The nickname just slipped, but I knew you loved it, because you told me a few days after. The happiness we both felt that night was so contagious that even Lizzie couldn't help but smile when I told her about our date the next day.