Drarry Animagus Oneshots

Ferret to the rescue

A/N TW: sexual assault (minor)
Asexual Harry btw :)

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Ugh, Hermione and Ron are so in love and it's so unfair! Why can't I have someone like that? Someone to hold me, to say they love me, to kiss me sweetly and passionately, someone to notice my mood swings during the day, someone to- I don't know! Maybe just, to pay attention to me? Pathetic right? I just want what everyone else has.

There are so many couples in Hogwarts - it makes me feel so lonely. I swear every Gryffindor couple snog and have sex in the common room. It's disgusting! I do not need to see that when I go sneak down to the kitchens for a midnight snack. It ruins my appetite people!

I hate having to hide from people getting off in the corridors. I mean, dudes, get a room?! And like, just stop talking about your sex lives 24/7?! Life as an asexual is alright except when peoPLE HAVE NO THOUGHTS FOR YOU AND ARE TOO BUSY DOING WHAT EVER THEY WANT IN THEIR LUST ADDLED MINDS.

Sorry, rant over.

To get away from teenagers, I often hide by the lake, under this beautiful willow tree. It's really peaceful, no strange noises from people, no moans or groans. Just the wind, blowing through the trees leaves. It's very calming.

Well, it was until a white ball of fluff fell on top of me.

I was writing my Potions essay, feeling quite proud of myself as I kinda knew what was going on, when an albino squirrel fell on top of my parchment and spilt my ink.

It froze and I watched, shocked, as the ink blossomed and stained its gorgeous, white fur. It chittered angrily for a moment before shuddering its whole body and sprayed ink everywhere.

Merlin, can it not do that? Now I have to wipe ink off my face!

I sighed, and grabbed my wand and cast a cleaning spell over me and the squirrel. I'm such a nice person sometimes. Why does no one appreciate this quality of mine?

The albino squirrel snapped at my fingers before chittering angrily at me and launching itself at the tree. I watched it disappear into the foliage, hoping I would never meet it again.

Luck is usually on my side but only for life or death situations - not scary squirrels or trying to avoid lust ridden teenagers.

I found it the next day. Sitting right in my spot. It looked dead and I hoped it was before its nose twitched and I realised it was just sunbathing. I stomped over frustrated and nudged it with my foot. It squeaked and glared before scuttling off.

That's one pest dealt with. The other, is a brunette and is heading my way right now.

"Harry!!" Ew, Romilda Vane. Girl in my year who gets with everyone. We were playing Truth or Dare in the Room of Requirement the other night when people found out that I had never kissed anyone, I had never dated anyone and I had never got off with anyone. It was mortifying as I soon got many suggestions from many people.

Most backed off after I blew up about it, but not this one. Romilda smiled at me, albeit creepily. I hope that pesky squirrel comes back and bites her.

"Hello Vane." I mutter. She frowns at her surname. "Harry, call me Romilda, or Romi! I'm not Malfoy, you dont have to call me as if we are enemies."

She smiles at me and I grimace back. "I think I will keep calling you Vane. I hope you dont mind." I said, staring at her hard enough to make her uncomfortable. Her smile falls and she coughs a little to clear the tension in the air. "So, have you thought about my offer?"

I inwardly snort. This would be the offer she made me during potions class that made me lose 50 points to Snape and gain 2 detentions. The offer was that I would give my virginity and all my other firsts to her so she can lord it over the Wizarding World and in return she would provide me with any woman I wanted, whenever I wanted - willing or not.