Blackout

Blackout (not edited)

I look her squarely in the eye. " Can't or won't?" I asked.

"Both." Today we I told her my feeling toward a certain boy named Ethan. I told her my feeling about being a full month in a new school, I couldn't help but feel normal for once. Hell, I haven't felt normal in a long time.

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NOW 

Today is Friday. My back is healed, physically I am healed. I have battle scars. I no longer have to take injections. I can ride my skateboard. I don't need to take Luke's car everywhere I need to go now. Physically I am healed. Mentally...

The ledge. Ledge. Ledge. Ledge. Ledge. Ledge. It was getting closer, and so I jumped. Everything exploded in my head as I made the choice, the choice to get drunk, and dance around at 1:00 p.m in one of Luke's button-up white shirts, with a bottle of vodka in my hands. I was twerking and grinding on the wall in a tispy state, when a bright idea popped into my head. Earlier last year on my 16th birthday I got a black dress, it was skin-tight, and it ended underneaath my butt. I always told my mom was never going to wear that, I mean where would I wear it.  In my drunken state I felt free. Like no one could hurt me. 

I pressed againt the wall on my back not feeling any sore muscles, or the permanant lashes that are there, I can't feel anything. I am numb. Numb. The word gave me shivers. I cllosed my eyes, and felt my fingertips pull on the dress. My scars were healed by bruises gone, everything was gone except my sanity.

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The club was full, she got out of the taxi cab. And struted right up to the entrance. The bouncer looked her over. The dress was basically her skin her bust was big and her butt was round. It showed off her legs perfectly. He left her in. She tried not to give off her shock. As she passed couples making out she realized this was a different bar than she was used to. They didn't take ID's this was underground. She smiled inwardly. 

She downed her fifth shot of vodka, from the shot glass. She left the bar. Streaming lights, pounding music, sweaty bodies. Just like old times.  She didn't know who she was grinding on now, but she did know that she has been doing it for an hour. Guys just kept coming and going. 

She stumbled to the bar, that guy that she was with was behind her, she could feel his muscles. She looked tothe bartender and saw a familiar face. "Artsy?" She asked. The boy from her free period turned to look at her shocked. 

"Oh shit." He mumbled. He sped out out of the bar and ran somewhere.

The hand that was around her waist spun her around. There was a tan man. With a taut jaw and high cheekbones. "Hey there, blondie." Said the guy.

"The name is Piper." She slurred. 

"James." He replied. She felt herself spinning and then pushed into a wall. Lips were on hers, and then they weren't they were on her neck close to the top of her chest. She moaned in pain as he sucked hard on her neck. She could feel herself becoming sober, little by little tha pain woke her up.

Her subconscience yelled in her head. "No leave me! Make me numb!" Fear enveloped her senses and tried to push him off, but he didn't get her sign he just pulled her closer. She felt teeth at her collarbone, grazing over and over. And then he was pulled off of her. 

"She's MINE!" Someone roared. She saw Ethan pull the guy off her. she slumped to the floor. She felt blood splatter on her, the smell raising to her senses. She remembered the memories, flooding her, washing her, drowning her as she remembered the smell of her blood, of her tears, her screams, the taste of blood, everything, and then finally his blood.

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I know I haven't updated in awhile. I've just been clearing my thoughts with Journalist stuff.

~ Brittany