Transitioning
By lomoony
Transitioning is hard, transitioning might hurt.
Transitioning might end with a loss.
Not a loss of self, but of others, of the ones that don't deserve you.
If they leave because you want to become you, why would you want them to stay?
I often wonder these things, as I look in the mirror at myself, or as I desperately try to sleep but can't get the thoughts of "They'll leave." out of my head.
But I also remember, as I look in the mirror, my face now may not be mine, but my face later will always be.
As I twist and turn at night, wishing for the pain to go away, I know that one day it will be worth it.
For the day I first go on T.
For the first time I see myself after top surgery.
For the first time I can look at myself and fully love myself.
For when I can help my trans brothers and sisters and siblings.
Tell them it will be worth it.
See their smiles.
See them laugh.
Make sure they know that the people who leave don't deserve them anyway.
I don't want peoples kids to be trans.
But I want the kids who are trans to live.
