Ruel reaches his hand out and grabs yours, feeling how cold it is. He squeezes it tightly. "I'm worried...about your health."
You freeze up at his words. "W-What? I'm fine-"
"No, you're not, Y/N. Don't lie to me." He interrupts, his voice now stern. You stay silent, unsure of how to respond. "I see how skinny you've gotten. How little you've been eating. And don't you dare try and tell me it's some diet, cause the way you look right now is not fucking normal. It's not something people would be promoting, unless they were crazy."
You flinch, surprised by his harsh words, as tears form in your eyes.
You're still ugly, even after all that work. Even Ruel thinks so. Your negative thoughts invade your mind until you can barely hear what the boy in front of you is saying.
"I'm fine." You cut off whatever he was speaking to you about now, and his eyebrows raise in surprise.
Before you can even try and stop him, he reaches out and lifts his shirt that you're wearing at the moment, high enough to where your whole stomach is exposed.
"You call this, fine? Look how visible your ribs are, Y/N!" He exclaims, pointing to the outline on your skin.
His interrogation suddenly makes you angry. It's none of his business what you look like.
You push his hands away and stand up from the couch, sending him a glare as you do so. "My body doesn't concern you, Ruel. It's mine, and i'm telling you that i'm perfectly fine."
Sadness and guilt flash in his eyes. "Please tell me you're joking." When you stay silent, he continues. "Baby, this isn't healthy. Of course it's your body, but i'm only trying to look out for you. I'm worried-"
"Well don't be." You finally snap. "I'm not yours to worry about."
This time he's the one who freezes, while you curse yourself for what you just said.
"What? What is that supposed to mean? You're my girlfriend, of course i'm gonna worry." He slightly rambles, now standing up in front of you. All you see in his eyes is worry.
You avoid his gaze, and all you want to do is get out of this uncomfortable situation. Which is why you say, "Well maybe I shouldn't be." It was the only way you could avoid talking about your...habits.
The looks he sends you makes you regret your choice of words immediately.
Panic is what shows on his face next, and he quickly shakes his head. "Baby what? W-Why are you saying this?"
You don't stop him from grabbing your hips, but you continue to look away. "I-I dont know."
"Look," Ruel cups your face, forcing you to stare up at him again. "I'm sorry, okay? I'm sorry for making you uncomfortable, but you have to understand where i'm coming from, Y/N. You look sick. Even Sylvie and Coco have asked me about it." That surprises you. You didn't think anyone noticed. "I love you, and I just don't want anything happening to you. So please, please talk to me about this. I promise i'll help you get through whatever you're feeling right now."
A single tear finally slips, his rant suddenly making you emotional.
You didn't want to admit that you had a problem, but the way he's staring down at you, as if you're his entire world, makes you feel guilty. You knew the risks of what you were doing to your body, and chose to ignore them. Ruel could've lost you.
The thought of that terrifies him, and he's told you many times before.
"I...I just feel so ugly." You begin, wrapping your arms around your body for a sense of comfort. Ruel does the same, pulling you against his chest. His silence tells you to continue. "The event that we went to almost two months ago, that-that's when it started. I saw all of the gorgeous women there, and I-I just felt gross next to them."
"Y-N..." Ruel trails off, his voice filled with sadness. "I'm being completely honest, so please believe me, when I say that you are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen." Your doubt must've been obvious when he looks down at you. "None of the women at that event could even compare to how breathtaking you are, and i'd know that, because all of the men there couldn't take their eyes off of you. I couldn't either, trust me."
A small smile appears on your face at his confession.
"You have to let me help you." He whispers, brushing his thumb over your cheekbone. "Let me show you how beautiful you are. To me, and to every other person you've ever met."
You bite your lip unsurely. "It's not gonna be easy, Ruel...I-I can barely look in a mirror without wanting to-"
"I know, love. I know." He wipes away the few tears that had slipped. "But i'll be right by your side to remind you of what's true, okay? I'll always be here."
And although it took time, Ruel really did teach you how to love yourself again.
smaller than this ♪
Start from the beginning
