Whispers

A hopefully ending, he prays for.

Staring at his reflection in the mirror, he frowned when he realized how it looked at him with such discontentment -a mix of tiredness and anger adorned the familiar crimson look. The reflection mirrored his expression change, and he sighed, lowering his gaze as his shoulders slumped.

His eyes fell onto his smartphone resting on the sink, it's bright screen displaying a common online messaging app ... which was probably complicit in the dark circles forming beneath his eyes.

No, this statement was incorrect ... it was his fault alone.

That app did not install itself, it did not save his contact by itself, and it wouldn't always respond promptly to his messages by itself. That app was not unable to end it all, it couldn't rid him of the late nights all by himself on a bed, during breaks, alone in a forgotten agency room, always with his scent lingering all over him and marks on his skin that wouldn't let him forget his hands and lips for days... until they were completely gone, then he would come, and do it all over...

While calling out another man's name.

While calling out their married best friend's name.

He loves him... Shouto Todoroki.

But Shoto loves someone else.

Still, he accepted it, silently.

Tenya accept this ... unconventional friendship. He agreed to offer his body as a comfort to the other, to listen to his feelings and frustrations even when he found himself in love with Shouto. Even though it was strange, unethical, and even though it hurt to love him and hear him declare himself and groan for another man... He accepted him.

He didn't even notice. When he realized it, that was all he could do. To remain in silence.

As in all their meetings, when he would come over, Shouto kissed him on the lips without a word, shed both their clothes, bit him, deftly explored every inch of his body. He murmured feverish words and sweet nothings in his ear.

But they were nothing but sharp needles, for Tenya...

He got lost, he admitted it to himself. Got lost in what, how, when...

He always tried to be in control, if not at the center of the situation, so that he could see all sides of the circle, but when it came to this...

To them...

To what they had. The circle seemed to close absurdly fast, suffocating him until all he wanted was to scream at the top of his lungs as he was swallowed by nothing, by the nonexistent future that his cruel subconsciousness would use to stab his heart...

Please...

Feeling the lump growing in his throat - the circle was closing again- Tenya tightened his arms around Shouto, hiding his face in the curve of his neck. Through internally he was longing for him to find it out, to unravel everything Tenya was too cowardly to say out loud.

He silently screamed for Shoto to enter his mind just as he would get inside of him. Even if it wasn't his body that instigated him, afterward...

Soon, they were deeply connected. The other's heat seemed to burn through his skin, piercing him between pleasure and the emptiness of his devotion.

Please don't call his name... Not now...

Anguish broke the weak barricade that still resisted, overflowing hot from his eyes, and he recognized the signs that his lover was approaching the edge, just as his body would betray him again.

Never again, please...

Releasing his cry, suddenly everything had become equally warm...

His anguish, his tears...

The suffocating circle...

The intense ecstasy...

His beloved seed filling him, and finally...

"Tenya..."

The heat now welded the scars on his heart...

Notes:
Available on Archive of our Own!
Edited: 05/10/24