Jotaro sighed as he looked down at this watch. It was time to close the aquarium. He turned off the lights and waited for his co-workers to leave. He was temporarily working at the aquarium and he hated it, because it was quite a popular one in the area. Lots of people would come in here every day and the sheer amount of little kids and karens he had to deal with..
He made sure that all the people had left before he grabbed a small bucket of fish and went to visit his wife, the dolphin. He walked around the dark aquarium with his bucket and a flashlight, until he arrived at the pool that the dolphin was kept in. He set the bucket of fish on the edge of the pool and admired the dolphin's beautiful fins and rostrum, and he could feel his pants tighten.
He began to get undressed, but a flashlight shining at his face stopped him. He opened his eyes to see a co-worker, flashlight in hand.
"The fucking shit is this?!" screamed his co-worker."
"My name is Jotaro Kujo. I'm 28 years old. My house is in (somewhere in Japan), and I am married. I work as an marine biologist, and I get home every day by (insert time here) at the latest. I do smoke, and I occasionally drink. I'm in bed by (insert time here), and make sure I get (insert number here) hours of sleep, no matter what. After having a glass of DIO's tears and doing about twenty minutes of dying before going to bed, I usually have no problems sleeping until morning. Just like a depressed 28 y/o, I wake up with lots of fatigue or stress in the morning. I was told there were no issues at my last check-up. I'm trying to explain that I'm a person who wishes to live a very quiet life. I take care not to trouble myself with any enemies, like winning and losing, that would cause me to lose sleep at night. That is how I deal with society, and I know that is what brings me happiness. Although, if I were to fight I wouldn't lose to anyone."
Jotaro then killed his co-worker with Star Platnium and then fed body to his dolphin wife. The End.
