Lemons

1. Before

The year was 2006, and I was in first grade. The school always smelled of body Oder and strange things were sticky all of the time. I was 6, going on 7, and I hated it. I wanted everything to be clean. To be not sticky. Yet my classmates always found a way to make a mess.

I was smaller than anybody in my class, and with my bright blonde pig tails, purple rimmed square glasses and rainbow tee shirt, I still never stood out.

That was until half way though the year, we have to do a presentation on our favorite animal with a random person who had the same favorite animal.

I didn't think anybody would have the same favorite as mine, considering it was a Serval. The teacher got mad that I couldn't choose a Tiger or a regular house Cat, but servals were so much cooler.

That was until a girl similar to me raised her hand and said she liked them too, and wanted to be my partner.

She had dark brown hair that was up in a pony tail. She wore glasses, but only to read. She was a taller girl in the class, and I always knew she was super smart.

She made her way towards me and sat down, smiling. "I'm Gemma."

"I'm Bailey." I said softly, admiring her.

And after that day we were inseparable.

Gemma became my best friend in the matter of hours. She would stand up to the bullies for me, and I would let her copy my homework.

Gemma has a younger brother named Harry. He was usually around, considering he was only 11 months younger than Gemma. He was a straggly kid with buck teeth and floppy curly hair. Their mom definitely dressed him and had more control on what he wore than what Gemma did. Harry would wear sweater vests and corduroys, and Gemma looked normal.

From ages 6-14 Gemma and I spent every waking moment we could together. I would stay the night at her house or vise versa. We listened to the same music until I turned 14 and got really Emo, and she went really popular. We started our period on the same day at the same time.

"Oh god, what is this?!" She said in the stall next to me in 7th grade.

"Wait, do you..?" I whispered.

"Wait.. you too?" She asked.

"There's blood everywhere." I said, trying to be cool.

"My mom gave me these." She handed me a pad under the stall. "You stick them in your underwear."

"Why is being a girl so gross?" I said as I unwrapped the female diaper and stuck it in my panty line.

"Because we have to carry the baby. Don't worry, I heard Harry last night singing in the shower and his voice cracked at least 8 times."

I laughed and then got up, feeling weird about being able to hold children in my stomach.

My parents were very conservative considering I listened to My Chemical Romance and wore black most of the time until I hit High school.

But that's the thing, when I hit high school, my parents got divorced, so I was over at Gemma's more than I already was.

And Harry? He was still around, still getting cute. Still annoying as ever.

Gemma got very popular in high school very fast. She made new friends, wore cute clothes, did the whole glow up thing. I guess you could say I was a late bloomer. I still needed my braces off and my family after the divorce didn't have a lot of money, so a lot of my clothes came from good Will.

Gemma never judged me, and neither did Harry. Gemma was my best friend, and if Harry said anything Gemma would beat his ass.

Gemma tried out for cheer leading and got in. That made her status go way up, and for her to hang out with me just seemed wrong. But I found myself in the library or in the book club. I even became a musical theater person. Harry also did theater

Gemma and I were totally different people, but somehow that never changed our friendship. I became a little more popular because of the theatre thing and having Gemma, so by junior year I had some credit and people stopped making fun of me. I dropped the purple square glasses sophomore year and was wearing contacts. I was able to buy myself some nice clothes with all the lawn work I would do for neighbors, and I even saved up to buy myself a car.

Harry was still around. He got really attractive when he turned 16, and everyone knew it. He would go on dates, but none of them ever seemed to stick around. It's almost like he was never trying.

Harry had this girlfriend named Chloe. She was Harry's only long term relationship that he ever had, and it lasted grades 10-11. She was beautiful. Blonde, smart, funny, everything that the Styles family embodied. But she was toxic. There were many nights where Harry and her would fight and it would end bad. She would gaslight him, call him names, scream. She even called rape on Harry when he never touched her.

After that messy breakup, Harry never had eyes for another girl. He would take girl's out, but he was so picky.

Well, that's what Gemma said, because she had a lot of boyfriends.

I didn't really go anywhere near boys. I liked them. I liked to look at them and Fantasize about them, But I never could get a date to anything. I always had to be a third wheel with Gemma and her date.

A little voice in my head always asked me what it would be like to be Harry's date for something. I mean, He was in our same grade, he was only a little younger than us. Gemma would never let that happen though. Harry has always been like a brother too, but I won't lie and say he hasn't continued to get better looking through the years. 

Nobody knows about my little crush on Harry, not even Gemma, and I tell Gemma everything. She  has been my rock through the majority of growing up. 

When my parents got their divorce, the Styles opened their home to me like nobody else had. My mom caught  my dad cheating on her, so she dissapeared to California and regretted to take me with her. And My dads new girlfriend is only 5 years older than me, so I dont like to be around the house. I spent the majority of my junior year at the Styles. And starting my senior year, i dont think a whole lot will be changing. 

That is until we go away to college. 

Gemma wants to just stay home and do community college. "It's all the same degree no matter where you get it." she tells me. 

I agree with her, but I have bigger dreams. I wanted to just go to a bigger campus and live in a dorm, but everyone I know is pushing me for Ivy League. My aunts and uncles, mom and dad, guidance counselors, especially Gemma. She will probably throw hands at Yale if they dont accept me. 

"What about Stanford? You can live with your mom then." She tells me. "Or move the Boston and go to Harvard and we can go eat the best food." 

Again, she's correct, but my mom hasn't reached out for anything in years, and I dont know if I can even get it. 

I know Harry wants to go to college. His hopes are on a football scholarship, and is good enough to get one. At least I think so. 

As the final days of summer pass and school is about to start for the last time, I think everything will be okay. It's the last year to try and make something of myself. Yes, I am editor of the school Newspaper, and I do some theatre, but I need to put myself out there more.

Maybe then some things will get better.