Crazy Alone | Byler

Chapter 1 | I'm gay

This book is inspired by @bylerlife 's book I'm so in love- Byler go read it!

"Guys im almost finished.", I said.
My name is William Byers, I'm just a normal 14 year old boy living with his mother and brother in a small town named Hawkins in Indiana.

My parents are divorced, I don't see my dad much but that's okay. He's wasn't really a person I would wanna become anyway, unlike Jonathan.
I can trust Jonathan more than I can trust myself. He knows all of my secrets, except for this specific one.

I'm in love with my best friend.

"Will we can't play right now! We have more important things to do!", Mike Wheeler, tall, soft black hair, cute freckles and my best friend.
Things have been going down with him since he met Eleven. He was my safe spot, I could tell him anything and he would understand. He wasn't judgemental, at least I thought so.
Mike knows I'm gay. I came out to him last year and I was happy he didn't make a big thing out if it.

Halloween, 1984.
"Did you agree to this?", Mike said. "What?".
"To her joining our party.".
Mike and I were trick or treating with Dustin and Lucas, another two members of our party.
They had invited the new girl, Max, without letting Mike know and Mike was definitely not happy about it.
He never really left my side that day, or any day since he found out about the episodes I was having.
Eleven was missing that year and now I think that's why Mike was always by my side.
"Well, they were exited. I guess I thought you'd be okay with it.", I said.
"She's ruining the best night of the year.",
and with that Mike walked away leaving me behind. I don't really know why I stayed still, but the next thing I know, I'm having another episode.

I hated having episodes. It's like your worst nightmare coming to life. You're alone, it's dark and no matter how loud you scream, no one can hear you.
"Mike?..Mike?....Mike!", I screamed his name hoping he could hear me, but nothing happened.
My body was shaking. It was weirdly quiet. Until I hear a loud rumbling followed by a louder growling.
The Shadow monster.
I refused to belive he was real, that it was just a nightmare I would wake up from any moment now. The Shadow monster started moving towards me and I didn't care if he was real or not, I started running, I ran faster and faster and sat down behind a small wall burying my face in my knees. I was still shaking and just when I was about to lose all hope that someone was going to find me.
"Will!", someone screamed. I jumped and opened my eyes. It was Mike.
"Will, what's wrong!", he asked with a worried expression on his face. I was breathing heavily and frozen. No words would leave my mouth.
"I couldn't find you. Are you hurt?".
He helped me up and held me in his arms.
"I'm gonna get you home, okay? I'm gonna get you home. Hold on."
I was too shaken up to notice what was happening.

I held Will close to me and walked home. After a few minutes Will had calmed down, but I could feel he was still scared so I rubbed his arm to comfort him. He looked down and smiled.
"You okay?", asked him to make sure.
"Yeah.", Will looked up into my eyes and I smiled at him. I know you're not supposed to feel this way about a boy, but Will made me feel special, loved, like I wasn't alone.
After El went missing, it felt like some part of me had gone with her and I didn't think someone could replace that missing part of me. But Will somehow did.

When we arrived home I brought him straight to the basement and placed him on the couch.
"Do you wanna tell me what you saw?", Will opened his mouth but froze. Seconds later he started crying, which broke my heart, so I panicked and hugged him.
He didn't stop so I stroked the back of his head, that seemed to calm him down and I continued until he stopped crying.
"I'm sorry, it's okay...it's okay I'm here, you're safe.", I whisperd in his ear.
He immediately calmed down and pulled away from me.
"It was dark and cold, and I was alone. I- I saw this thing.", Will started shaking again so I put my arm around him.
"The Shadow monster?", I asked and he nodded. I leaned back and put his head on my chest and comforted him, I can't imagine what he's going through.

My head was resting on Mike's chest. Everything was quiet.
"Mike?", I said breaking the silence.
"What is it?",
"I- I need to tell you something", I started.
Mike looked at me with a worried expression on his face.
"I'm...gay."
Silence.
"O-Okay."
I pulled away from him and looked down.
I was hoping to hear more from him, but on the other hand he didn't push me away and called me a fag like my dad did after showing him the rainbow spaceship I had drawn.
There was a long moment of silence.
Mike looked at me, all negative thoughts went through my head.
I shouldn't have told him, I'm so so stupid. He's never going to talk to m-
In that exact moment Mike hugged as if his life depended on it.
"Thank you for telling me Will.", he whispered.