Escaping Reality

Chapter 34: Slimed Out

David pulled up hot and screeched the car to a halt, inches in front of the garage door. The whole crew got out of the car and strutted toward the front door. It was unlocked, apparently, nobody locked their doors here. I wiped my feet on a mat that read "trap door", which was sort of fortuitous.

"My name is David aka U-Neek and this is my crib," he said in true MTV cribs fashion gesturing with grandiose hand movements to his home while spinning around.

He gave me a tour of the main floor and it was nothing spectacular. There was little furniture and the rooms had a mattress and maybe a TV or a dresser. There were clothes all over the place and food laying on any flat surface. The place reeked of dank just as bad as the car. He took me to the kitchen which was stocked well.

"We got just about every type of booze you could dream of here. We also got a lot of weed if you haven't noticed, so we get the munchies a lot. We got every possible snack you could dream of. Fruit snacks, fruit gushers, cheez-its, goldfish, chips, cookies, you name it we have it." He said showing me the pantry that looked like it was stockpiled for a zombie invasion or some post-apocalyptic scenario.

The cabinetry was all outdated along with just about everything else on the main floor, I was not used to this type of furnishing but I put a smile on my face and took it all in. Guess this is sort of what I had to look forward to if I ever joined a fraternity.

"Whatcha think so far," David asked.

"It's pretty dope man, looks like you guys have a lot of fun here" I responded trying to sound as polite as possible. However, it wasn't a lie, judging by the holes in the walls and the scattered pictures everywhere that looked like that had had their share of good times in the house.

"If you think this is cool, you haven't seen anything yet. Up next is downstairs, prepare to be blown away." David said proudly.

"I'm excited to see it," I said while praying that it wasn't worse than upstairs.

Before even making it downstairs I could tell that this space was significantly more coveted. Nailed above the downstairs door was an orange sign that read 'Soundcloud god' and featured a crown atop the plaque. The door had a lock on it that David had to fumble with before swinging it open. He waved me into the basement, or as he called it 'where the magic happened'.

"Woah..." I exclaimed in amazement as I looked around.

"I thought you would like it," he said in a satisfied voice.

The basement or spacement as I called it was huge. Not only was it huge but it was glammed out. The lighting was the first thing I noticed, there seemed to be a permanent dimmer on creating a more relaxed atmosphere. There was a ping pong table, a foosball table, and a pool table. There was a giant flat-screen TV with a sectional leather couch surrounding it. It was one of those slippery leather couches that you just seemed to sink into. I forgot to mention the TV had surround sound.

Those two features alone would have made a pretty solid basement but that was only the tip of the iceberg. There was a mini-fridge stocked full with sprite and some purple liquid that was supposed to make you feel "like you were floating on a cloud" according to David's other friend Gregg. There was also a vape bar with an array of juices that could be mixed allowing for thousands of flavor combinations. To the right of the vape bar was a mini candy bar. Only it wasn't full of candy but weed-related products. Brownies, gummies, joints, blunts, candy bars, and brittle.

David also seemed to have an unhealthy obsession with signs and picture frames. The walls were plastered with portraits and such of some of the biggest rap names in the game. Other signs just had random sayings on them or quotes from famous people. Darryl even had a few pictures of him and some of his idols framed, some of them looked like they were photoshopped but I wasn't going to call him out. Tickets from major music festivals were framed. Bonnaroo, Lollapalooza, Coachella, and any other pop culture festival seemed to be represented on the walls.

"Have you been to all of these festivals?" I asked, gesturing to all of the wristband passes.

"Yeah, anytime I can afford to attend I'm there trying to make connections, market myself, and 

meet some of the artists" He explained.

"Here is the holy grail, the actual studio." He said motioning to a room sectioned off where it appeared he did his actual recording. It was soundproof with a soundboard and everything, pretty legit.

One of the coolest wall decorations was in the recording room. It was titled 'The History of Music Listening' and displayed every music listening device from the walkman to the modern-day iPhone on a timeline. Another cool feature was the labeled lyric table with tons of notepads and books on musical geniuses and songwriting.

I couldn't even imagine what it would cost to outfit a room like this.

"Ready to get to work?" Darryl asked as he turned to face me.

It was time to see if I could actually get some bars off or if I was about to be kicked out of the crib for wasting their time.