Hesitated (editing)

We're Back. Again.

January 2nd

I stared out of the car's window as we made it to the other end of the renowned radio-blocking-tunnel. The one that surely gets me exhilarated every single time I pass through it. I guess it didn't work for me this time. In half an hour, I will be back there. Again. At least now, it will be my last.

Ariana's God is A Woman was playing through my earphones. They did a pretty decent job in blocking every noise coming from my parents. They were utterly excited from what I could tell. Too excited to not notice that their son was not on the same page. They were talking about many things, some were arguably gibberish but one caught my attention.

Zed.

Chills ran through my spines. Do they know him? How possibly?

"Aries, Zed arrived yesterday. His mom messaged the parents' WhatsApp group asking if anyone can keep him company. Are you close to him? I guess you can stay with him after we left if you don't like being alone."

My silence did nothing but exacerbated the tension in the air.

"Look honey, we are truly sorry that we have to send you off early this time."

I instantly unplugged my earphones and looked at Mama. "Nope. We aren't close. I barely know him and I'm good on my own."

Well, I lied about two things; firstly, I hate being alone and secondly, I do know him. Maybe a little too much that it got myself into trouble.

We have not been talking since that day. I'm not sure if he knows that I already knew. Why? Was it a mistake? What was happening? I need the answers now! I know I ain't like this. I have been through something similar and I coped with it eventually but with him I'm like...... stuck.

I replugged my earbuds, leaned against my comfy seat and shut my eyes.

This is not love, is it?