Still Standing

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The time we spent together was in vain. You used me and left me in shreds. Well, maybe it was my fault. I was stupid, stupidly blind. Everything you did was like magic to me. It was a circus, everything was a farce and little did I know, I was the clown. 

You played with my feelings and laughed at the emotional state you left me in. You took pleasure at tormenting me. Saying you cared in my face but instantly turning your back on me and playing others like you were doing me. Cheated on. Fucking cheated on. Fucking others and laughing at me when I found out. Laughing at my hysterics, laughing at my emotional melt-down. 

That god damn pain. That fucking pain. When my eyes watered uncontrollably and tears ran down my face. My heart, how strong it was when I wasn't. It kept beating, it kept going even when I could feel nothing but sadness. From all the experiences I shared with you, the one that was the worse. As if I could choose just one. But the one was when you involved yourself with a person already in a relationship. You broke them, you put yourself somewhere you should have never gotten yourself in. You broke them knowing they were a family. You broke it and enjoyed the drama you created. You loved it when I was involved, trying to hard to save you. I should have saved myself instead. The moment when I was involved and I was spit on. The most degrading thing that happened to me was your doing. And you laughed. 

I was stupid. Hilariously stupid to you. I was such easy prey, such an easy target.

Somehow I got away and I prayed. And life has been good to me of late. God, the universe, everything that is good in life that removed you from my life. 

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