Restless

Chapter 1: Finding You

Preston

I cringed as the sun hits my face. I'm on my way towards the subway to buy my ticket heading to Seventh Avenue, I need to pick up my luggage and some other stuffs before going to Hawaii. I can't wait to get out of this polluted and toxic place and breathe some fresh air. I crossed the road and head straight down the stairs. If only I didn't lost my metro card, it would be much easier but since I'm a person who doesn't really care about his things, what do I expect? I already lost ton of my belongings, I wouldn't be surprise if my house went missing or if I got lost. That would be hilarious but not shocking. 

I didn't notice the person next to me and stepped on their foot. "Watch it!" I jumped a little and saw a middle aged woman facing my waist. I apologized quickly. I sighed as soon as I saw the crowd of people pushing each other to get to their own destinations and realized that I would be one of those people. Cause of death: suffocation.

As I fall in line, I let my eyes wander around and in that moment, the face that I've been longing for catches my eyes. I didn't care how long the line was, I still left and follow her. My eyes which is focused on her is following every moves she makes, making sure that she won't be out of my sight. I don't want to lose this chance, who knows if I'm going to see her again. I want her.

I need her. 

People keep on appearing everywhere like mushrooms. This is the hardest challenge I've received in my whole life. I know, so low. The struggles of getting to her and the feeling of being abandoned is creeping inside me. I don't want this. 

The funny thing is I forgot to ask her name and I bet her name itself can make me feel at peace. And why do I sound such a hopeless romantic? Is this, is this what they call falling in love? Crap! I'm getting corny! My manliness is being strip away from me. What a joke.

She moves so gracefully as if she's floating like what the hell? There are so many of our species in here but why does she walk like it's nothing? Maybe the people are making a path for her? And there goes my imagination. I swear I can imagine all the weirdest stuff that no person can even think about. I'm weird and she loves it. I saw her nearing the door of the train and that made me nervous.

"Shit," I mutter as I try to squeeze between these slimy people. I looked up and the doors are opening. "Shit," This time I said it louder and the lady next to me gave me a dirty look as if I care. I'm getting desperate now. "Hey! You! The girl with the brunette hair!" Every girl who has the color I just shouted turned around and I want to kill myself for not realizing that she's not the only one who has it. Such a stupid move Pres. All those girls turned but she didn't. 

She sang to me that night, the one she made up in just seconds. That amazed me more than anything even if the song is funny to hear. I wanted to laugh but I'm scared she'll be mad and I know that I'm turning purple from holding it in. And she knows it.

"Ah shit. What are the words? Matcha? Mocha? Machete doo dum dum?" I winced at the words I'm saying. "You know what? Fuck this." I take in a lot of air. Inhale. Don't exhale. "Matcha betcha let it let it go! Bam bam badum!" I shouted at the top of my lungs and I swear the station went silent and everybody stopped to look at the crazy person who just shouted. I can feel the heat on my face and with this, somebody will think I'm a human sized tomato and sell me at the market. I hope they sell me at a very high price. My body is to die for, I'm not some one dollar bill. 

She turned and at that moment, the time slowed down. Her hair flowing behind her and her face crunched up in confusion with her lips parted a little. Those lips that I want to touch so badly. To kiss. And the doors closed.

Her eyes screams for the person who sang the song. But she didn't saw me. She didn't found me in the crowd.

It aches.

The crowd started to move again and the place that I last saw her is now empty. Her presence is nowhere to be seen and I want to kill myself for letting another chance slipped by. I want to punch something. I wasted yet another-- fuck.

A lot of thoughts are swarming in my head as I stand before the train, waiting for the doors to open. I'm not giving up. I won't, I know that there'll be a day that I would catch her and spend more time with her. What if I give up now? I'll regret it forever and forever is an understatement. 

I get in the train and searched for an available chair. I'm so stressed out, I need that Hawaii trip now.