Diary of an Embalmer (Eli x Aesop)

Diary Entry 5

~July 8th, 1888~

Mentor Jerry has returned! Except, he seems quite injured. What has happened to him..? He is currently resting in his room, and has told me not to disturb him. Doing as I'm told, I continue to to write in my diary. Mentor has changed ever since he left, but he has been gone for quite the while hasn't he.. He hasn't yet forgotten me which I'm thankful for, but he is different now.

What was so horrifying and terrible that happened which caused my mentor such trauma? It intrigues me, I must find out. Since I am his apprentice, shall I receive a letter as well? How, confusing to say in the least. I must and I will find out what has happened in the place mentor went to. I shall ask him at first light, but then again I don't want to bother him.

Mentor Jerry has refused to eat and is currently sleeping, again. For the second day in a row. Why has he changed? It worries me, but it also angers me. He's told me or rather, taught me before to never accept no as an answer.. Would it hurt, to lay him at rest? If he has no intention of living, what would hurt in dying? He should be ready, shouldn't he?

I'll have to convince him to follow me to my office. Should I ask him to help me with a patient? No.. I've been in his care and have been independent, it would raise suspicion as I've been doing everything by myself. I should allow him to rest and regain his energy first, and then I'll ask him to handle my patient while I pretend to buy.. No, I can't. I've recently restocked on all my supplies and have paid the taxes. Why have I not thought throughly enough, I cannot allow my mentor to read this page. Or this diary, I must hide it but he'll surely ask to see it. What shall I do..

Mentor is still asleep, but it is nearly dusk. I've thought of a strategy by now, and in mere hours I shall set it in action. Although I'm not ready for the grief I'll feel when he's gone, I'll rest well knowing he'll no longer be tired, angry, and in pain. My, how lucky my mentor is to have me. I'll set everything up and at the break of dawn, he'll be sleeping with the others.

I did it.. I, I really did it. I am exhausted and my mentor looked at me, with fear..  And betrayal or what it seemed. His legs were the first to give out and he fell under his own weight. I sat beside him enjoying the last moments of his life, and I told him I'd miss him and to wait for me until I arrive. When I looked at his face, he stared at the table in front of us. When I looked at his eyes for the last time, they were filled with regret.. What ever could he be regretting? Was this not what he have wanted? I'll be sure to work hard for the both of us, he is currently in my garden where he'll be accompanied by her. Talking to Mentor Jerry and not hearing a response is surprisingly quite comforting. I'll hold out for the both of us, I wish to join mentor Jerry but it is still to early. 

It is quite a beautiful sight, my mentor, the only person who taught me everything I know, lays dead in a beautiful patch of roses. He lays near where he laid her. My mentor would be proud had he seen what I've done, he looks much better in this state. He is forever silenced, but I forgot to ask him something. Why didn't I wait a little longer? What is this feeling..? Why did I not ask him what had happened to him? Why had I been so impatient? No, I should not question my actions, I only did what I was taught. Why am I lamenting over something such as this? It is none of my concern, but it is. I wish Mentor Jerry told me what to do at this moment, but all he can do is listen. It does not matter now, the past is the past. I cannot undo my actions. It should be no surprise that he emits such a weird aroma but I have gotten used to it. 

It appears I need rest, I shall continue writing in this diary tomorrow. You and our father are the only ones who knows what I've done, and that will be our little secret only the three of us know, hopefully I'm accepted as mentor is waiting for me. It is only half past eight, but I am feeling quite tired. It must be due to the events which have occurred this day, how tiring. I haven't felt this tired ever since the first day I was taken in. There are a lot of things which I haven't asked mentor.. I'll be fine without him, now there's no one I need to impress..