Angel's Journal (re-editing)

Kill or be Killed

Dear Journal,

I think she finally forgives me. Well at least that's what she's showing me.

Darla had dug into my anger so much that I did want to kill her, but when Buffy showed up at the Bronze (where I knew she would) with a crossbow. Suddenly my anger rushed out of me and all I wanted to do was kill Darla. Buffy and I ran through a whole jumping around kicking and punching until I gave up and she pined me into a corner. She released a blow, but it was kind of far off. I knew by the look in her eyes she couldn't do it and neither could I. So I told her my life story and was rudely interupted by Darla. Buffy and I were ready to fight, but she brough some friends with her. (Two Guns) she shot me and it hurt like hell. I eyed Buffy telling her I was fine and gun shots coudn't kill me. She understood and her attenion went back to Darla. The win was most likey to Darla, but Buffy manged to hide behide things that were thick enough to protect her from the pistols. At last I knew Buffy was running out of things to hide behide so I regained as much strengh and ignored the pain. Thinking about how much I didn't want to see Buffy die helped. (A lot) I grabbed a large wood pole and it went right through Darla like butter was greased on it.

I caught Buffy's suprised expression with a empathtic look. I tuned around and walk out of the Bronze and into the cool dark night.

10 million things were rushing through my mind. Did she forgive me, hate me, thankful. What was she thinking about right now.

The next night I could feel her presence near. She was at the Bronze with her friends and I couldn't help myself, but go see her even if she couldn't see me. Thankfully her best friend Willow glanced over at me and by the looks of it she told Buffy. She walked over and I did too. We stood in the middle of the dance floor and our eyes were locked to each other. We both agreed that this could never be anything, but I couldn't help but inch closer to her until our lips meeted. It was as if the whole world didn't exist anymore. Suddenly I felt a burning to my skin, but that didn't matter as long as she was there. We both broke off the kiss and I suddenly I felt the heat on my chest. Her cross had touched me.

She asked if I was okay, but I didn't answer and she thought it was painful to kiss her and not that her cross had burned me. She said goodbye and walked back to her friends. I stood there blanked faced and was ready to pouce onto her and kiss her again. I strained myself and walked out of the Bronze.

~ Angel

Love - Love is a funny thing. It can be the greatest feeling in the world, but it could also leave you feeling as empty as ever. It can cause tears of joy or tears of pain, but without love this world would be a world without passion, fire, and happiness.