Conditions, Buzzwords, Death, Stop (BeetlejuiceXOC)

Prologue: Moving

"Lixa! Come help me and your siblings move the boxes, will you?!" I hear my dad yell from downstairs as I look at myself in the mirror. I frown at my appearance.

Even when I try to look nice, I look as ugly as ever. Damnit.

"Okay, Dad!" I yell back at him and I pry my eyes away from the dastardly mirror.

I make my way downstairs, making sure to not think too much about myself. Wonder if my dad is going to get me another therapist. Probably.

I know he only wants what's best for me, but I'm getting tired of it.

As I make my way to help with the boxes my father smiles at me.

"Thanks, Sweetie." He says and ruffles my hair a bit. I chuckle.

" 'Course Dad. It's no problem." I say as I make my way towards the moving van. I help move the stuff into the van and when I'm done I brush my clothes off. I want to at least look presentable with my clothes.

Soon enough, we're on the road. My friends plan to get there their own way. I'm in the passenger seat as my father drives. We're in the van, my brother is driving with Marge. His girlfriend.

My youngest siblings, Lia and Jaelin, are being watched by Neveriah in the far back. Neveriah, along with my sister Kitie, are both adopted, but I love them all the same. Kitie is going with the Allen twins, Noah and Nora. Jaelin and Brian are in the middle. Brian is gay and I'm proud of him, and Jacob is a nerd but owns it.

"Hey, Dad? Will I have to go to school?" I ask and he looks at me and then the road.

"I don't know yet sweetheart. I was planning on getting you homeschooled until you are better with your mental illnesses. Unless you want to go back to school?" He says and I shake my head no.

"I don't want to. It's a new environment." I say quietly and he smiles at me. He puts one hand atop of mine to comfort me and continues to drive.

I feel Brian tap my shoulder and I look back at him.

"How are you feeling?" Brian asks.

"Pretty good," I say with a shrug.

"That's good, and look. I'm pretty sure we're here." Brian says and points out that window. I look at see a pretty big house, but not mansion big, outside the window.

It looks like it could use decorations but apparently the people who lived here before us cleaned the place up. Fixed the walls, and stuff like that.

I let my eyes wander over the house, and take it in. My eyes stop at the window of the attic. I see two people looking out of it and I stare at it.

I get distracted from my brother's cries and look to see Jaelin crying because he dropped a bag. Luckily, it only had pillows and blankets in it but he is still sad.

I look back at the window only to see nothing, so I head over to Jaelin.

"Hey, bud, it's okay. Look." I say and I pick it up and hand it to him. He sniffles but smiled at me and runs it inside. I sigh and go to help with boxes.

I help carry them inside and then I help with furniture. Soon, we get everything inside and the moving van leaves. My dad then has us help move things around. I go pick my room and I find a room with a window seat and I can get to the roof through the window.

It also is big enough for me, but it's not too big. I like it and I set my bag down. I go downstairs to find my dad.

"Hey, Dad? I picked my room out, can you help me get my furniture up there?" I ask him and he looks at me and smiles.

"Of course, Sweetie." He says.

He helps me and I decorate.

(That's what her layout it pretty much except this is instead by her wall.)

(Also, she has a balcony to the other side of the window seat.)

I look around and admire my room. I think me and my dad did a pretty good job. I sit at my desk and grin at my room.

"Sis! I'm having a crisis!" Brian yells and barges into my room. I raise an eyebrow.

"Yeah?" I ask.

"I can't decide on a pair of clothes.." He says and sets them out in from of me. I look at them and then grin.

"I think the simple, but elegant dress suits you," I say and he nods and leaves to go change. I go to my boxes to unpack a few other things. I get my pride flag out. It's a Bi pride and I also have a rainbow one to support the whole LGBT+ community. I hang them up side by side and then I get my guitar out. I put it next to my bed and then I get out my ukulele. 

I put my uke on my window seat. I get out some posters.

I have all kinds of posters. The Exorcist since it's one of my favorite movies, a Juilliard College since I want to go to school there, a Harry Potter poster, a Percy Jackson poster, a Hunger Games poster, a Divergent poster, a Maze Runner poster, a Narnia poster, and my group's poster. We made it ourselves.

I hang them up around my room, and then I go back to the box of stuff. I pick up a bundle of letters.

Heh. Letters were always my specialty. I smile at the bundle of letters and then a look down.

"Damn, time changes things.." I mumble and then I set down the bundle of letters onto my desk and I sit down.

I get out a piece of paper and a pencil.

Dear Anyone,
         I have no idea why I'm writing this. Maybe it could be a sign I did have a heart or something for when I die. I can't talk to anyone, so I guess that's mainly why.
        I miss Alexa and Justice. I miss my old town. I miss my mom when she was nice. I miss the old me.
       I know this is a new start, and it's not something everyone is lucky enough to have, but I am still not happy about it. I know I should be, but I'm not.
       I love my dad, and I am so grateful to be his daughter, but he can be a little overbearing and pressuring when it comes to my recovery.
      It's been two weeks since my elder sister and brothers deaths. I think I should move on but I can't. I'm really fucked up. Maybe people would be better without me around.
    I'm thinking about, I just need a plan. Just a way. They'll get over it. I know they will. I'm not that important. I'm just.. Me.
     I don't want to leave them though, because they could get hurt while I'm not around. I don't know anymore.
     I'm ranting on a paper. I should just crumble this up and throw it away but Nah. I'll just hide it or some shit. I'm going to go now little paper. Bye.
        ~The Fucked Up Girl, Lixa