𝗥𝗢𝗠𝗘, reddie

016. prato

By the time the noises have stopped, Eddie is laughing so hard that tears are dribbling down his cheeks and Mike has joined in, sitting next to him to have a view of the phone.

"I don't think the sandwich stripper life is for me," Richie mumbles, biting his lip to hold back laughter.

"The what life?!" Mike responds.

IMESSAGE: HETEROPHOBES ANONYMOUS

dumb idiot
i embarrassed the FUCK outta myself 2day

can we get an f in the chat

moth
F

stampy
F.

Please don't tell me you broke another dish.

dumb idiot
,,,,,

stampy
You dumb whore.

moth
STAN YOURE SO BRUTAL

richie baby what did u do

dumb idiot
eds called me cute and i panicked and threw my knife in the sink so hard that the dishes all fell and.....

and the knife hit a cup and ..... broke it.....

and then called myself a sandwich stripper

moth
you dumb whore

there should b therapy 4 homos like u

gay panic should b a mental illness

dumb idiot
sorry boss i can't come into work 2day my gay panic is flaring up again ://

moth
sounds like a plot for an au

stampy
I have no idea what that means.

moth
an au????

i always forget that u all had miserable childhoods and didn't engage in Fandoms . couldn't b me 😔😔

dumb idiot
i accidentally read a gravity falls fanfic where that kid with the hat fell in love w the triangle when i was 15 and cried

stampy
I'm about to engage in Gen Z terminology.

Gravity Falls hit different after that.

moth
did any1 else get their gay awakening from disney??

stampy
... I did not

moth
ur so cool 4 a hetero i always forget ur straight

dumb idiot
my gay awakening was austin moon

i watched austin & ally until i was 15 just for him

moth
THATS SOCUTEKSKSJ

my gay awakening was alex russo 😌😌

stampy
Alex Russo was a lesbian, I don't take constructive criticism.

moth
i would KISS HER on the MOUTH

dumb idiot
honestly why am i not holding justin russo in my arms rn u know???

moth
bcs ur in love with eddie

stampy
Because he's a fictional character.

dumb idiot
):

IMESSAGE
CHIE, EDS

eds
chie!!!!!!!

chie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

chie baby!!!!!!!!!!!!

hey!!

hey hey hey

answer me ):

):

):<

chie
AWJWJS

what eds baby!!!!!

eds
:D !!!

i watched ur music video!!!

chie
i'm SO telling boris that u called it My Music Video

eds
shsksj ur the star of the show ...

also ur cousin looks kind of like u but scarier and edgy

chie
he's me if i had a jawline and longer curlier hair

eds
he's u if u were slightly less cute

WAIT NO THATS MEAN

ur cousin is very cute.....

i'm just trying 2 compliment u but evidently i'm bad at that....

chie
ur the cutest person ever shskjs

did u like the video!!!!

eds
yeah!!!!!!!