The Religious Ones

Ch.11: I Can't Stop Caring.

My feet pound on the dirt of the path. Twisting and curving with roots, sticks, anything, my feet adjust to the pain. Like the rest of my body, they numb. Running takes away the thoughts that crowd my head. It provides a numbing sensation. One that I crave.

My pace slows as I near the familiar end of the path. Crosses over what seems to be a threshold, a force field formed of trees. A beautiful expanse unfolds beneath me feet as I exit the blanketed sheet of trees and enter an environment of breath taking beauty.

A few short strides carry me towards a small wooden bench that lays in the middle of the small circle shaped field. Almost sounding like a whimper, a small sigh escapes me as I collapse onto the bench. My exhausted body craves sleep and I obey. Resting my head on the back of the chair. Enjoying the feeling that my numb body slowly emits.

"Nate!" I scream out again "Nate please!" It's even hard to hear myself over the noise made by others. Looking around, I realize that Weeds are being shoved back and forth, my family. "Angel." Gilly calls, guilt presses her face when she sees me. Holding a baby in her arms, she walks towards me. Well limps.

"Gill. What's happening? Why are they doing this?" She closes her eyes in pain. "They're here. They found us." Shaking my head no, "Who!" "The government!" Again, my voice finds itself. "No! Who told them!"

Pain washes her face. "It was Nate." She mumbles barely audible. I know I heard her but I didn't accept it. "Who did this!" I scream at her, getting a clear response now. "It was Nate!" And I can't take it. I crumble to the floor. Tears washing down my face. Sucking in shallow breaths.

Every last person was slowly pulled away. They didn't want me. I wasn't good enough. I wasn't worth it. Well over an hour later, I couldn't take it. I forced myself into a stand and dusted myself off. Slowly walking to the doors of the church, I call out for my last hope. "Evan!" No response.

The last string of hope was tugged from me. It's like I was being pushed down. Gravity taking its toll. A whimper escapes me and a final tear falls onto the floor. This can't be happening. Everything I love. Gone. Nan, Evan. Nate. And I know, I know, that it's over. It's all over.

Drawing in a heave, I take in my surroundings. No longer back at base. But a small opening hidden by trees, a small bench which I sit. And screams erupt through the forest. "Angel!" Nate calls, rushing towards me. "I'm here. What's wrong?" He pulls me into me, causing me to flinch from the contact. I will never stop feeling like this around him. "Shhh." He soothes my cries. "It was just a nightmare." He says and I repeat him. "Angel." He pulls my chin and I look up into his eyes. His beautiful eyes. And the words he repeats next, it's like he was in my nightmare with me. "It's over Angel. It's all over."