The Spectator

Chapter 29: Like Like

     "Have you spoken since your fight?" Blair asked gently. He looked so forlorn when he said she was leaving, it was actually touching.

     "No..."'

     Blair frowned. "At all?"

     "We've been... busy..."

     "Bullshit, Nathaniel!" Blair hissed quietly, lest Henry be listening in from the hallway. "She's leaving the Spectator because that's what's best for everyone in this situation, can't you see that?"

     "Why is he obliged to keep talking to her?" Her husband interjected, a brow quirked. "Maybe he isn't interested anymore."

     "Not interested anymore?" Blair exclaimed. "Just look at him, Chuck! He's falling apart!"

      Nate shook his head incredulously.

     "I'm literally right here--."

     "Nathaniel is not falling apart, he's just had a rough few weeks. He'll recover," Chuck ignored his friend and continued arguing with his wife. "What he needs is to get back out there, have some fun, some drinks, get a new girl--."

     "Right, because that always solves everything," Blair pursed her mouth. "Let's ignore his emotional needs and drown him in booze and whores-- what a great suggestion, my love."

     "Ahem!" Nate cleared his throat loudly. They both finally turned to him. "You know this is why I don't come over more, right?"

     "Nathaniel, we wouldn't be so concerned if you would just talk to us," Chuck told him with a little exasperation. "If you don't like our advice, maybe you should tell us what you want instead of sitting there insisting denial is just a river in Egypt."

     "Yes. What he said," Blair nodded. Nate leaned back against the sofa, wilting under their glares.

     "If I talk to you...do you promise not to tell Ella? Or the Humphrey's?" He asked, feeling incredibly juvenile.

     "If there's anybody who can keep a secret, it's us," Chuck assured him.

     "Then..." He sighed. Where to begin? He'd had no one to confide in about this for so long and now there was just so much to sift through. "I know she was under a lot of pressure with her Dad and with work, but... It feels like she wanted to leave just as things were settling down with us."

     "So, you are still interested in her?" Chuck followed up.

     "Unfortunately," He sighed.

     "Why aren't you happy she's leaving then? Doesn't that mean you get to be together?" Blair knit her brows. She was surprised he was actually opening up. It had been a long time coming.

     "But we were together before! God, that's what pissed me off the most during our fight, she kept acting like what we were already doing was nothing. Us sleeping together was supposed to be a secret, but it was never... casual, you know? We got along way too well for there not to be feelings mixed into everything. It was the closest thing to a relationship I'd had since... well, since Sage Spencer."

     Chuck and Blair nodded, remembering the too-young actress that had been Nate's last official girlfriend.

    "And she still had her job, which is the really important thing..." He rubbed his face as he continued. "She only had to leave now because of me, do you understand? She worked so hard at the Spectator and, just like that, all of it means nothing because I couldn't stay away from her. I... I feel like I am to her what Diana Payne was to me."