unfazed (mileven au)

i trusted you

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A couple of days had passed and El still hadn't told Mike.

She wanted to, needed to really, but every time she tried the words just got stuck and there was nothing she could do to get them out.

She was afraid, so afraid of how he'd react once he knew what she did.

She had a good feeling that he'd be angry, of course he would be.

But would he be so angry that he'd never want to see her again? Would he never want to talk to her again? Would she never get to kiss him or hold him in her arms again the way that she loves to? Would she lose him over something she never even meant to hurt him by doing?

Those questions ran through her head constantly, to the point that she was absolutely terrified to tell him anything. It had become so hard for her to simply look at him the same, an insane amount of guilt rushing through her each time she laid eyes on him.

Really, she didn't know how he couldn't just tell that something was up with her. If he did, he would surely be able to force this secret out of her and she'd have no choice but to face the consequences.

Mike clearly had bigger things to worry about right now though, so it wasn't too likely that he would notice how weird she was acting.

He spent most of his time worrying about everything going on with his mom. He worried over it so much so that El could tell it was killing him. He didn't know what was going to happen to his mom or if his dad would do anything worse.

He was making as much of an effort as he could to go see his mom and to get this all sorted out, but he wasn't having much luck with that one.

El could see how much this was bothering him and wanted to take his mind off of it all, even if just for an hour or two. He needed a distraction and she could at least give him that, which is what led the two to reclaiming their spot on the bridge at Lover's Lake.

They were currently sitting with their legs dangling over the edge, El's head resting against Mike's shoulder. The birds were chirping in the far off trees and the sun was beaming off the water that pooled below them. It felt so nice out and if they had been here under better circumstances, she knew they'd be having a great time. 

Mike hadn't said much though and neither had she, which she didn't have too much of a problem with. She wanted him to have a break from it all and if he wanted to do that silently, then she'd sit here with him as long as he needed her to.

After a bit of time had passed, she figured she would check on him. She could feel his steady breathing as she clung on to his arm, but she needed to hear his voice. She needed to hear something, to know what was going on in that pretty head of his.

"Hey, you okay up there?" She asked, tilting her head up to look at him. "You've been awfully quiet."

Mike gave her the smallest of smiles, attempting to reassure her that he was fine. "I'm just worried."

It seemed her plan to clear his mind hadn't gone as she'd hoped it would. It was wishful thinking really, she probably wouldn't be able to stop him from worrying about this no matter what she does.

El let go of his arm, reaching her hand up to turn his face back toward her. "Hey, I know it might not seem like it now, but it'll all be okay, Mike. I know it will."

Whether he believed her words or not, he nodded his head softly and wrapped an arm around her, placing a tender kiss to her head along the way.

"Thank you."