narcotic // a newtmas au

not a team up

"Well thanks for nothing guys." Thomas huffed as he glanced back at the two men.

"Wait you're just going to leave us here."

Thomas shrugged. "The webs will dissolve in a few hours."

"Wai-"

Thomas shot his webs on a building and was gone before the guy could even finish his word.

____

"Newt!" Minho snapped as he barged his roommates door open. "What the fuck man?"

"Problem?" Newt asked as he tipped his sunglasses down and let the straw of his drink drop out of his mouth.

"Yes! You're calling this a solution?" Minho waved a paper in front of his face. It was a sign Newt had made with blue marker. It said "No drug dealers allowed" with a poorly drawn picture of him slicing off the head of a man. Newt snickered as he looked at the next picture which was of Newt sitting on the headless body while smoking a relatively large blunt.

"Hey, if I saw that, I wouldn't come in." Newt took a deep breath and stretched his legs that were only covered by a pair of red and black plaid boxers. "Now if you'll excuse me, I was busy here."

"Newt!" Minho snapped. "You're watching H2O in your boxers while drinking chocolate milk."

"Chocolate almond milk Min, I'm not a heathen."

"What does that even mean?!"

Newt let out a breath. "Min come on, it's not that serious."

"You thought it was a big deal when I told you!"

Newt shrugged. "I changed my mind. No one's died in a while right?"

"I think that's wrong. I don't want Eran to find out because then she'll actually beat out asse-"

"You'd like that wouldn't you?"

"That's besides the point."

Newt laughed loudly, clapping his hands together and almost spilling his chocolate milk. "I always knew you were into some submissive shit Minho."

"I'm not!"

"Not even a little bit?"

"Even your gay ass thinks Eran is hot!"

"See now that's besides the point...now come on Min, Cleo just got splashed with water, I need to know if Lewis is going to find out she's a mermaid!"

"Newt come onnnnnn," Minho whined. "We have to do something about this before we're held accountable."

"I know that what you're saying is you expect me to fix it and that's not going to happen." Newt sat up on the bed and put his milk on the nightstand. "If I fix it, I'm just going to slice some people up until it's over."

"So? That's what you always do."

Newt cocked his head slightly. "I don't think Spidey would like that."

Minho groaned loudly. "You're still on that?!"

"You're still on Eran!"

"Can we please stop discussing our landlord?"

"I don't even know where to find these lethal drug lords."

"Yes you do."

"Until a week ago I thought the drugs were being stolen. Now I'm realizing we were just kinda transporting them, not selling them."

"That's just because we're stupid."

"Just a little bit."

"Maybe Spidey can help us!"