The Wonderfully Absurd Moments Lived by Jessica Raine

Travel Choice and Challenge

The answer to that question, as it turned out, was cash. Have you ever had to count out $600,000 in one hundred dollar bills? It takes a very long time. Luckily, Jessica did not have to take in this once in a lifetime experience, as Panacea Incorporated had accountants to do that sort of thing. It still took the poor accountants hours, as their brand new bill counter had just started malfunctioning, meaning they had to hand count out six thousand little pieces of paper. Four restarts and one mental breakdown later, the money was paid in full and counted. Jessica and Gregory could be on their way. Jessica had chosen her fancy babysitter well, in that he already had his full pilot’s license. He has had it since he was eleven years old, or so he claims. Either way, Gregory thought that the controls to this inexplicable car were close enough for him to figure it out, and by four o’clock in the afternoon they were in the air and on their way.

“So, Miss Raine. Where are we going?” Gregory asked Jessica.

Jessica leaned her seat back up and sat forward. She reached out to the small screen that sat in the centre of the radio. She tapped the glass screen a few times. “On- ON,” Jessica muttered.

Gregory reached over in front of her and pressed a button in the top corner of the screen. The glass lit up and displayed the words, Panacea Incorporated Positioning and Navigation System.

“Thanks,” Jessica nodded. She tapped the screen, punching in random letters until she found a word that appealed to her. “Grenada! Oooh, look! It’s in the Caribbean.” Jessica grinned and hit the confirm button.

The moment she hit the button, the steering wheel was yanked out of Gregory’s hand and disappeared into the dashboard in front of him. The window before them faded to black, and the red Netflix symbol slid into view.

Jessica laughed. “I like this car already!”

‘Select account,’ a feminine voice rang through the car.

Jessica hesitated. “Um… Jessica?” she stuttered. The screen changed to reveal a selection of movies that the computer seemed to think Jessica would enjoy. She shrugged. “I’m in the mood for whatever. What do you wanna watch, Gregory?”

Gregory’s face remained unperturbed. He shrugged and reached toward the window. His hand touched the glass and he slid the list down, browsing.

Jessica counted 943 seconds until Gregory finally decided. He chose a foreign horror film Jessica had never heard of. They selected the movie and put on French subtitles, just the way Jessica liked it. The movie began and Jessica’s eyes slipped slowly closed to the sounds of fake bones cracking and fake blood spurting.

Jessica woke up slowly. First, she could hear. Screams. ‘The movie.’ She thought drowsily. She opened her eyes and was greeted by a girl’s dead, staring eyes. Jessica looked over to Gregory. Tears had stained his cheeks and he was doing his best to wipe them away inconspicuously. Jessica stifled a chuckle.

Gregory cleared his throat and sat up straighter. He looked over to Jessica and she quickly shut her eyes and let out a sigh. Gregory reached over to her and tapped her shoulder. Jessica faked being startled. “Huh- Wha- Oh, Gregory. Are we there?”

Gregory shook his head. “No, Miss Raine. A flight to Grenada from Toronto takes approximately 11 hours. We have over 9 hours to go.”

Jessica groaned. “I don’t suppose this car comes with a bathroom.” In response to her question, the windshield lit up with a face that Jessica could barely make out.

“Panacea has not yet installed a bathroom facility in this model. To get this feature installed, please visit the closest Panacea Scientific Headquarters. Have a wonderful trip, and thank you for for purchasing Panacea.” The feminine voice rang.

Jessica paused for a second, before throwing her arm over her face and whining, “Why is it eleven hours?”

Gregory didn’t respond, instead he turned away from Jessica and tapped the windshield and it came to life.

“Hello, Gregory.” The voice greeted him.

Gregory grunted a movie name that Jessica couldn’t quite understand. “Great stuck in a sardine can with a man three times my size, who only watches Russian movies.” she thought. “Oh well, may as well use this opportunity to sleep.”  And she did.