Josephine's Lists

Chapter 20- Tell All

"Oh, hmmm. I am not certain. Allow me to ruminate on such a fascinating inquiry," requested Lord Cavender, whom proceeded to take a large bite of buttered toast, staring off into the distance.

Tennyson wasted no time picking up where they had left off. "What sort of grand gesture did you have in mind? I am desperate for your company this morning. Name your price Miss Yorke."

She dramatically tapped her chin in meditation. A part of her was overjoyed at his riding invitation, the part that craved his attention.

My irrational, romantic, and ignorant side.

Another part of her wanted to freely list the offenses he had amassed against her and then kick him before stalking out, the part that was hurt and frustrated.

My rational, intelligent, and a tad childish side.

It wasn't what Josephine wanted, but she requested the only bargaining chip she possessed. "Give me back my waltz," she challenged, and Tennyson stiffened at the request.

"Your waltz?" he questioned, although perfectly understanding her.

"Yes, my waltz," Josephine reiterated, masking her regret. "I promised you the first one. Tomorrow is the Rivingdale's ball and I want it back."

Tennyson argued, "Although I won the waltz fair and square?"

"Hence it being a grand gesture. If you want me to ride with you this morning, and if it is truly important to you, the first waltz is mine to dance with whomever I choose," she finished, sounding more confident than she felt.

Tennyson huffed a frustrated breath, but conceded, "Congratulations. You have your waltz back."

Josephine remained expressionless offering a simple nod and then dabbed the corners of her mouth with a powder blue napkin.

"Now, seeing as how the matter is settled, eat with haste," he commanded. "You promised me a ride and I intend to be paid in full."

                                       ~-~

Josephine tightly gripped the reins, watching Isabella and her cousin, Miss Horton, galloping ahead at a flashing pace. The girls had encouraged Josephine and Tennyson to ride at their own leisure and to meet them at the old carriage house. They had clearly been instructed by Tennyson prior to the ride. Josephine couldn't discern the purpose of their morning outing or how much the girls knew, but she was grateful for the privacy.

"Your strategy has worked," Josephine observed, squinting as the morning sun poured through the trees. "We are riding alone in the woods, which, I assume, was your plan. I know this, because you leave nothing to chance. So, if it is your intention to murder me out here, I only ask you do so quickly."

He lightly chuckled, "Something tells me that killing Miss Josephine Yorke would be no easy feat. Although, I may have fantasized about it a time or two."

"Only a time or two?" she returned, and their playfulness almost made her forget the trove of unpleasantness which had transpired between them. Almost.

But the dull ache in her chest and the sinking sadness each time he looked her way was a painful reminder. She had freely offered her heart and he had freely rejected it.

She didn't know why this ride was important nor what Tennyson needed to say. Josephine had conjured different scenarios in her head but everything he did was unexpected. She could no sooner guess the number of hairs in her horse's mane. Possibly he wanted to apologize? Possibly not. Yet, his mood gave her hope.

Josephine had easily convinced Lord and Lady Cavender to return to London after the Rivingdale's ball. Lady Cavender had accomplished her largest goal, a husband for Constance. And the Cavenders, being ill-suited for country life, were anxious to return home. Josephine, too, wanted to leave Loewick House as quickly as possible, but she hated leaving things so unsettled between her and Tennyson. She hoped the morning ride would facilitate a truce. Or, at least, give a semblance of closure.

Tennyson sharply pulled his horse to a stop, prompting Josephine to follow suit.

"We will stop here a moment," he stated, appearing serious and giving no room for argument. "There are personal matters I must discuss with you."

"You gave me back my waltz. I suppose following your demands is part of the bargain," she acquiesced.

He quickly dismounted and before Josephine could do the same, both his hands were firmly grasping her waist, lowering her feet to the damp morning grass. She tried to steady her traitorous breath as the tension rose to an indisputable pinnacle. Josephine immediately stepped back pushing from his grasp.

Distance. He has the power to shatter you into pieces smaller than sand. Impossible to put back together...

Tennyson cleared his throat and silently gestured to a fallen tree. After throwing a blanket atop the withering trunk, he said, "You will want to sit."

"And if I do not?"

He gave a pointed look. She sat.

Tennyson grappled with how to begin. "It is difficult for me to...to um explain. You see, yesterday I received some news..."

"News?"

"Not news exactly, but rather, unsubstantiated gossip. Wait...Perhaps I should first tell you...no, first I should ask you..." he wavered.

Tennyson behaving indecisively was an oddity, which only fueled Josephine's frustration. She demanded, "If you do not start actually telling me something, I will likely scream."

"A true test of patience is when we are ignorant of that which awaits," he theorized.

Josephine stared, visibly unimpressed.

Still staring.

Tennyson got the message, continuing, "Would you prefer to discuss your lack of patience another time?"

"Excellent idea," she dryly agreed.

Tennyson braced himself to tell her everything. Josephine had been correct. He had planned out their ride and premeditated his sister's departure. Tennyson had also prepared what he wanted to say and in which order he needed to say it. But, as he looked at her exquisite blue eyes glaring impatiently, there was only one thought that came to mind...

"I am in love with you," Tennyson suddenly blurted, rendering Josephine speechless.

She didn't know how to respond. Shock. She was in shock.

Then, she turned furious...

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Another chapter down! The next one will have all the good stuff!!
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