Hi my name is christy (name changed to protect identify) i live with my grandparents. I was once a victim of rape and now a surviver of rape, i got counciling and that helped me. But what i am going through now, no counselor can help me get through it. I have to do it on my own and by myself, i have to learn from my mistakes and try again. I find it to trust anyine, cause when i do it, i always end up getting hurt, either emotionally, mentally or physically. sometimes i wish i never lived, and those who know me, knows that i tried to kill myself several different times. I'm kinda of a tomboy, so i don't act so girlly, for most girls they like to sit down with their pairs and talk about their problems, but not me. I prefer to keep everything bundled up inside me like boys do. And then erup when the slightest of things go wrong. Recently i've learned that writing things down really helps me to get over my problems in my life. I started this writing thing in the seventh grade, at first i liked writing about not only fiction but real life. I dream of a day when all this emotional, and mental hurt will stop. But it seems far fetched; but until that day rolls around i'll never stop writing my stories. Most of them are bleak and heartless like this one, but when you've seen your step father beat your mother to nothing and then turns around and rape you. And you have to live with that for the rest of your life, then your stories would be bleak too.
