Man of the Year (Drake Story)

Chapter Fireogtyve

“You’re welcome.” She grinned.

“But it’s sad that you can’t say the same for me. You can’t thank me for always being here, because I won’t be.”

“Yeah, you’re right about that. You always leave me without saying anything and I wonder where you are and it’s kind of disheartening because - wait, what did you say? You said you won’t be? I think you meant that you haven’t been.”

Now was the moment of truth.

“Sit down, baby.” I tried to smile for her. “Why don’t we sit?”

She was onto me now. She squinted her eyes slightly, and stayed standing before me. That said enough, the fact that she refused my request.

“Okay, fine. If you want to do it this way, we’ll do it. I feel like I’ve been living one huge lie, Keziah. I thought I had friends, people I knew, people I could trust. But they’re all gone. From my life, I mean. I removed them. I had to. What was I supposed to do? I found out that these people were aware of one of the biggest crimes on earth being conducted right under their noses, and not only did they say nothing about it, but they hoped that when Drake died they would be able to control it. I really considered, while I told Haley to get the slaves to bathe and eat, to keep my friends around. To try to understand what their motive was. All I came up with was greed and insanity. You had to be greedy to be willing to stand by while it was happening, with only the cash in mind. You had to be insane to not see the immorality of it. Maybe it’s because my friends are white. Half of me is like them, but half of me connects with the heritage of those slaves. I feel their plight. Their struggle is mien. It’s yours, too, and I thought that maybe you would have understood that. But you stood by, too. You wanted your share of the will, and you were willing to achieve it anyway possible. Right? Is that what happened?”

Keziah was crying now. She held her hand over her mouth, like my words made her want to vomit. She nodded, the tears rolling over her fingers. All she could was nod.

“That’s why, then.” I said. “That’s why I can’t stick around anymore, because you are heartless. You are an angel, a heaven-sent gift, and all you do is make me feel like shit because you treat me like the man I’m not, like a good companion when I’m really an asshole. You make me feel guilty for that. You’re precious to me, Keziah, and I don’t always treat you like it, but -

I couldn’t believe it. I couldn’t believe that right now, when I was supposed to be laying it on her strong and quick, I was getting choked up. Maybe it was the words coming from me, the truth about how bad I was and how good she’d been, or maybe it was the sight of her crying before me. Something, whatever it may be, caused me to pause my speech for about ten seconds, to gnaw on my bottom lip and look away from her for as long as it would take to regain my composure.

“You’re precious to me. I don’t always treat you like it. But you’re heartless, still. No matter how much it pains me, I can’t be with you. I can’t love you the way I used to knowing who you really are inside - nobody. Beneath your flawless skin and pretty smile and charisma, you’re nobody. All you know is to survive because you’re not a real human being, Keziah. If you were, you would have left me by now. You would have reported Drake and moved out. You would have found someone who could show you who you really are and then love you for it.” A warm tear fell from my eye. Just one. “That person is not me.”

Keziah’s shoulders shook. Her eyes were closed and she hugged herself, pulling her arms tightly around her. I knew she didn’t want me to try to console her. It wasn’t necessary now, for me to give her my warmth when I was going to rip myself away soon. She spent five whole minutes there, torturing me with her sobbing. And then it stopped. There was no progression. The crying didn’t ease, it didn’t get softer. She went from one-hundred to zero in one second.

“So you’re leaving?” She asked. I didn’t know yet. I hadn’t thought about it.

I was about to purchase Drake’s house, once he was dead and I had my inheritance money to pay for his mansion. I could keep this place as a second home and move Keziah out, but where would she live? All of the newbies would be out of a house, because I wouldn’t have them live with me any longer. That included Keziah. She would have her inheritance money from Drake, and then she could pay for a new place. Yes, that’s what she could do. Pay for a place.

Pay for this one.

“You can stay here. I’ll move out. Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine.”

“I wasn’t going to worry about you.” She folded her arms.

“Fine,” I shrugged, “then don’t. I’ll send someone to get my things out of the house by tonight.”

It wouldn’t be by tonight, probably not even tomorrow if my busy schedule didn’t clear. But I couldn’t make her think of waiting that long. If I told her to tonight, she’d remain calm for a few hours. Her emotions, whatever they were, would boil down.

“Alright.” Keziah nodded. “Okay.”

And that was it. Okay. It was okay for me to leave, it was okay that we were over. Not literally, because it obviously tore her up inside, but it was ‘okay’. So I took some emergency items for a few days, and I left. Because it was okay.