minute by minute / evak

026. "But i'm a toxic person, too."

Suddenly, i lost my balance and took a few steps away from the door, trying to get it back.

"Isak!"

I heard Even yelling my name behind me. His voice sounded more beautiful than ever before, but it was... indistinct.
Everything was blurry, and i thought that my life would end in that moment.

"C-close the d-door. D-don't le-let him in."

I stuttered, before feeling myself fall onto the floor. But Even catched me before i did so. Like he always did. He always saved me.

And then everything went black.

...

When i woke up i opened my eyes slowly, the bright light of sun hurting my eyes.
I had being carried onto our sofa, and i was laying on my back.
I started to hear people talking in the kitchen, but i only recognized Even's from all the other voices. His voice was crystal clear in my head.

I got up fast when the thoughts in my head started to brighten up. Even was in huge danger right now, and probably getting himself beaten up by that awful person.
I ran into the kitchen, where the voices were coming from. I looked for Even everywhere, before i saw him sitting at the table. He looked calm, snd better than ever. He was just fine, sitting next to Lucas.

"What's going on?" I asked with a weak voice.

I was tired and exhausted. I felt like total shit.

"What is he doing here?"

I panicked when no one answered to me, and i just wanted to scream badly.
Even noticed immediately how broken i was, so he got up from the table and walked to me. He took my hand into his own, and intertwined our fingers.

"It's good to see you too, son."

His words made the blood boil in my head, and i squeezed Even's hand. He looked at me with his beautiful, blue eyes, and that calmed me down a little.

"How dare you." I hissed from between my teeth.

I almost saw that evil person through his now black eyes, and in his self centered smile. I wanted to punch him more than anything. He deserves it.

He deserves to die.

"What? You should be happy that i'm here!"

He turned to look at Lucas, and smiled to him. And Lucas did the same back. They were almost laughing at me, and to my words.

"I should be happy? For what?"

The tone of my voice got higher, which i really hated. When i was angry, i always sounded like a ten-year-old little boy who's balls hadn't settled down yet.

"Isak." Mom tried to talk to me.

"For cheating her? For hitting your own son, as you say i am to you, because i fell in love with a boy? For being an alcoholic, careless piece of shit?" I yelled.

I turned to look at Lucas to see if his facial expression had changed at all. He looked shocked, and scared. But mostly afraid.
My words had affected him a lot, because we were the same.