commentary crew oneshots

safe (george x alex)

george just wants to feel safe. for as long as he can remember he's never felt truly safe, not at home, not at school, nowhere. probably because his mind has been plagued with severe anxiety since he was around 7 years old he'd say, not exactly sure. but it all got worse when he got to high school.

he's not sure how it happened or, rather, what caused it, but something in george changed when he was 11, on that first day of high school. everything got so much harder to deal with: the significantly larger amount of kids than he was used to, unexpected judgement on everything he did, a whole new set of buildings. he couldn't take it.

11 years old was when george crumbled mentally. he started having major, frequent panic attacks, especially at school, meaning he was falling behind in quite a few subjects with how much he was sent to his safeguarding office.

of course, you can see why george didn't feel safe at school, but why not at home? well, everything starts somewhere. home was where the roots of the young boy's anxiety lay, dug in like trenches right through his brain. george's mum left him and his dad, he's not sure on exactly when or why but she left. left his dad with a heavy drinking problem, a scary thing for a young boy to see his father go through; that his father still goes through. he was a lovely man, he loved his son more than anything, all he wanted was a family. so naturally, when george's mum left, so did his dad's deep desire for that stable family. his dad left him too. not physically, but mentally, emotionally, he was gone.

this may be why he never had many, if any, friends, he doesn't want them, they're simply not worth the stress. so imagine what it felt like for george, sat alone in the back of his gcse fine art class, midway through year 10 and for the first time since he's been taking this class, someone sat next to him.

obviously he wasn't going to look up, he'd keep his head down and ignore whoever it may be in favour of his easiest escape. however, this proved quite difficult, even for george. there were other seats this boy could have sat in, other people he could have sat next to, instead he chose george: the boy in the corner with his head down and legs crossed at the ankles under the table at all times, constantly appearing as though he's using his upper half to practically swallow himself to escape the room as if it were hell.

after 5 minutes of having this boy sat next to him, george could tell all he was going to do was talk to him, nothing else. despite this boy only knowing george's name after he built up the courage to tell him, he spoke to him like he'd known him for years.

the boy spoke and spoke as george's pencil glided across his paper; he hadn't once looked up. until the boy next to him said "oh, sorry i never mentioned before, i'm alex," with a smile he could hear in his voice. as much as george didn't want friends, he couldn't help but long for a friendship with alex. his pencil fell from his hand as when he looked up at him for the first time, not sure what to say.

once he'd found the courage he replied "i'm george," so quietly he wasn't sure if alex heard. "i know, you told me when i managed to get you to speak," alex giggled slightly as he said it, making george's heart melt a little. "o- oh sorry," he looked down, silently cursing his stutter. "no need to say sorry, george," alex reassured him with a warm smile, "anyway, what music do you like?" george smiled slightly and retrieved his pencil, starting to draw again to distract from his racing heart and tried to hold a conversation with alex.

it was an hour into their double lesson and george's eyes were creased at the corners and lips seemingly held in a permanent smile as he laughed and giggled at things alex was saying. he had no idea why he felt so safe with alex next to him, for the first time in years george felt safe.

"have you always been in my lessons?" alex asked george once they'd stopped laughing. george looked down at his drawing for a second before responding "i think so," quietly.

" i never really saw you much before but i noticed you were in class more this year,"

"i uh, i was out... a lot... in safeguarding," geroge answered, getting quieter as the sentence progressed, yet alex heard it never the less.

"that might be why i recognise you a little too," alex thought to himself out loud, gazing ahead of him.

"w- what?" geroge stuttered nervously, looking up at alex for a split second. alex met his gaze in that second thought and kept him there. "can i trust you george?"

george nodded and alex contiuted, "i used to have to go to safeguarding a lot too, and i still do a little now. depression," he gave george a small, weak smile, making the shy boy's heart do flips in his chest. "safeguarding suck to be honest george but uh yeah,"

for some reason it was comforting to the anxious boy to know that he wasn't the only one who felt alienated and alone with a shitty mental illness; but his thoughts were interrupted by the obnoxious sound of the bell ringing loudly.

alex sighed and turned to george. "would it be okay if i gave you my number? i like you george, i wanna talk to you more?" alex asked, offering a small slip of paper to the other. george struggled to find the words to reply; swallowing thickly, he nodded and took the paper from alex.

"great, i'll see you around george," and with a daring move, alex leaned over towards george slowly as to not scare him and placed a light kiss on his cheek before smiling at him and walking across the room towards the door, leaving george blushing madly, butterflies erupting in his stomach.

this is bad but you know