only one who knows

The Coffee Shop

He went to the studio. I was quite sad because I couldn't find a job. The only alternative was to work at the studio with the band. I would help them keeping the studio clean and sometimes would give my opinion in music, even though I hated to do that. I have such little musical and technical knowledge and was affraid of saying senseless things about a certain song. I think Roger was just happy to hear something positive about his work. I got along with the rest of the band pretty well and they liked to show me their ideas and sounds. I also liked to help Rick when his shyness made him affraid of saying or doing something. I liked to tell him encouraging words because he was very kind and reminded me of a friend, who is very shy too. David and Nick were also really nice to me and very funny. Even when things got really bad between the four of them and you could feel the heavy vibes in the atmosphere, Nick managed to be nice and relaxed and would level everyone.

However, I still wanted to have a job of my own. The studio was really good and I enjoyed to be there a lot, but I just felt I needed to work at somewhere else and be independent. It would be hard, really, because I had never worked outside my own house.

That was when I saw that the cafe shop in front of the studio was hiring an employee. I went to the cafe and asked if they could hire me. They only asked me why I wanted the work and if I had any experience. I said I didn't have any experience but I was a fast learner and was always ready to help in anything and could work at any time of the day. I got the job and the next day I was working there. I had a cute black apron with the logo in it and my colleagues were quite friendly and taught me how to use the coffee machine and other things. The cafe shop wasn't very busy most of the time and all the costumers were very nice too and also quiet people, who wouldn't disturb much. Roger would visit the shop from time to time to give me a kiss or when he'd get upset at the studio. Or simply to see how I was doing. The other members would also come 'round oftentimes and I'd always keep an apple pie without the corner piece for Nick.

My work mate told me to go home when he closed the shop and gave me a compliment for the hard work. After the first day I was too tired and walked to the studio, waiting for Roger to drive us home. The studio wasn't very far away from home, but my feet were killing me. I found him with David finishing some things about a song. I sat down, watching them and quickly fell asleep. I don't remember much after that. I think he carried me to the car because I only woke up when he was pulling in the drive way.

“Oh, good, you're awake.” he said, opening my door.

“You were affraid of having to carry me home?” I sleepily mocked, getting out of the car.

“No, you're light as a feather actually.” He answered smiling. “I just thought I had to bath you too.”

“Hm, would it bother you?” I asked, ironically.

“If you want to” he replied, winking. I felt the heat in my cheeks and burried my face in his shirt.

“No, I can take a bath myself.” I said as he gently drew me on the bathroom floor.

I had a good warm shower, brushed my teeth and entered in the room with a towel around my body and another soaking my hair. He was taking his boots and trousers off while sitting on the bed and went for his shower. I dressed a large white t-shirt and knee socks, because they were so comfortable. While I waited for my hair to dry naturally, I leaned over to investigate the LP's and found some clasical piano music. I put in on the player and I the first song was my favourite by Claude Debussy. I got kinda happy, because that song brings me good memories.

Then I started thinking of the present — my present. Where I'd be at school doing things that every teenager of the future generation would do. I thought of my friends and family then. Some of them would now, in the seventies, be younger than me. Some hadn't even been born yet! It was strange to think about. I felt sad then. Like I was completely alone in the world. And I could never return, once I had already lost the third day's sunset. And I couldn't even talk about that with Roger... he wouldn't help me much. Some tears rosed on my eyes, but I managed to not let them fall and tried to shake those thoughts of my mind. In that instant I heard the shower turn off.

I looked to Roger's boots. They were so big! I think one and half of my feet would fit there easily. His trousers were also really large, even though he was skinny as hell, but also really really tall. I realised how small I was then. I already knew I wasn't tall at all with my 165 centimeters, but I just felt so much smaller. Like when you're a child looking at your parents clothes and wondering if you'll eventually fit in them when you're older.

Roger walked in the room still soaking his hair with a towel in the right hand, a larger towel resting on his shoulder. He was only with his underwear on and even it was black.

“This sound is so pretty.” he sighed “I almost forgot I had that disc.”

I laughed quietly with trembling voice and I guess he noticed it, because he sat on the bed, next to me and looked at my face.

“Honey, what's wrong?” I had wet eyes and I felt the corner of my mouth tremble, while I tried my best to open a smile.

“I'm fine. It's just that this gives me nostalgic feelings. And it's quite sad sometimes...”

He hugged me and I weep on his shoulder a few tears. He didn't say nothing for awhile and I assumed he was choosing his words carefully.

“But, are those sad memories?”

“Not really... They're just a bit far away. Like when you have something you really love and suddenly it disappears. Then you try to hold it back, but you can't. You can see it and it's right there and you know you once had it, but you cannot reach it anymore.”

“I guess... I guess that's how memories work. But aren't you happy in the present?”

I looked at him.

“Of course I am. This is exactly where I wanted to be, but...”

“But...?”

“But I don't know how the future will be.” I said.

“Don't worry about that, right know. We still have a lot to live and many things to do for now. The future doesn't exist and the past is gone. It's the present that counts.”

“Did you ever miss something that doesn't exist or a moment you never lived?”

“We can't miss something we don't know the existence of...”

“But it's different...” I yawned, closing my eyes and ready to take a well deserved nap.

“How different?”

And I fell asleep with this question I wasn't able to answer.

***

Hello!
English isn't my first language and I'm still learning. I apologize for any mistakes you might find.
Thanks for reading!