Starting Over

Three

There was silence after that, with him taking in his words carefully. He thought their conversation was over when the man spoke again.

"And you have to forgive her, too. For not stopping to hear and listen to your side. For pushing you away. You might not be completely aware of it, but you're angry at her, too, Sean."

And the realization came a ton. He never thought of it that way, but the older man was right. He was angry – but he forgave her. He will always forgive her.

He tried forgiving himself, and he came to the point that he became ready to take that one step forward. Hence, him coming back to his hometown. But the responses of his friends and seeing Kaycee now – he felt he was now back to fucking square one.

All that pain, shame, and guilt came over him like a tidal wave. He didn't know how he's going to survive from drowning this time, especially now that he didn't know whom to run to. His best friends are already standing on neutral ground.

His mind wandered to his family. He remembered the look on his parents' faces when he confessed and delivered the news of the breaking of the engagement – it was a mixture of sorrow and disbelief. Looks that tell him that they don't know him anymore. Serris shook her head in extreme disbelief and walked out angrily. Sarah was just silent, but she was not meeting his eyes, not any less disappointed.

Miya and Cheuk sat him down, too, but they hadn't spoken much, like they were too disappointed to speak. His dad was the first one to give a voice to that nagging thought that hung in the air.

"I'm just...totally disappointed. I didn't teach you to treat a woman that way, son,"  he said, shaking his head in disbelief before exhaling a wary breath. He left him and his wife thereafter.

Miya had only looked at him, his eyes blurring with tears, before she engulfed him with a hug, crying with him.

Even though they talked to him again, something had definitely changed. He wanted to talk to them about what he had learned in the past couple of years and what he had planned to do, but his parents were still away in Italy for a vacation, and Serris was in Hongkong with Kylee.

Now he is standing in front of Sarah's office door where her secretary led him to. Sarah looked up from her work with a small smile as he entered the room. They stared at each other for a few seconds without exchanging words. Tears started to form in each other's eyes, and Sarah couldn't help but pout as she suppressed her tears before going over to her brother and gave him a tight embrace.

They spent the time catching up, Sean recounting his experiences and adventures in Japan, and Sarah updating him about the projects she had done and what was happening with the people back at home after he left.

Sean stood up, staring around her office, the walls decorated with her framed favorite designs that she made. His heart swelled with pride at the achievement of his sister and he wished he was there while she was reaching all of those.

Suddenly, he came in front of the only out-of-place design. Sarah only designs for high fashion, and his heart pounded mercilessly as a thought came to mind. He held his breath as he felt his sister's presence behind him.

"Oh that," Sarah started. "That's the final version of the wedding gown I made for Kaycee," she said, her voice light.

Sean could feel a lump rise in his throat, tears burning his eyes suddenly.