It's Now or Never

Part 14

Endgame:

It's been 22 days since Thanos' snap. My wounds are almost healed, but the scars will always remind me of what I lost. We don't know what happened to Tony or some of the other people on SHIELD's radar. For the past 22 days, I just sit in my room, sometimes Nat comes and joins me. Nat and I would talk about ways to get them back, but could next figure out how to make them a reality. I lost Wanda who I had grown close to and Sam who was my brother. Nat too had lost her family. After our talks we would just sit in silence, comforting each other. Steve won't leave my side since he knows we lost so much, but I always force him to give me space from each other so we don't go crazy. At night Steve and I just lay there trying to think of a way to change this. We don't sleep, we just hold each other. He just holds me so tight sometimes that I feel like he will crush me. I would cry and then try and fall asleep, while Steve would put on a brave face for me. Every day I hoped something would happen and change these events that have completely ruined us. We failed. All of us and we can't change it.
Steve still tries to keep me happy. We try and talk about other things than the events that happened 22 days ago, but it's hard to ignore.

This morning, on the 23rd day, something just felt off, like something was going to happen. I rolled out of bed and saw the bathroom door connected to our room was open. I saw Steve holding a blade, having just shaved off his beard. He sighs and looks into a side mirror.

He sees me watching him and gives me a small smile. I get up from the bed to walk over to him. "I liked you with the beard," I say as I lean against the doorframe.
"I needed a change," Steve says softly.
"Well I liked the beard, but you look handsome either way." I smile at him as he smiles back at me. "Come here," Steve says. I walk over to him and kiss him. I try to deepen the kiss, so we can get lost in our bodies instead of the mess we have been in for these past 5 years, but we are interrupted when I see the side mirror suddenly starts shaking, slowly at first, and then severely.
I grabbing my long jacket and follow Steve as he runs out to the yard in the Avengers Compound. Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanoff, Bruce Banner, James Rhodes, and I all look up at what looks to be a spaceship being pushed by someone. This woman lands on the spaceship and stands next to the door hatch. The entry hatch opens, and Tony and Nebula, who I heard about from the SHIELD computer walkout. I watch as Tony has to be supported by Nebula. Steve pushes past me and runs to Tony to help him stand up. Tony grips Steve's arm as he joins him.
"I couldn't stop him," Tony says in a sad voice.
"Neither could I," Steve replies with his head down.
"I lost the kid," Tony said as I walked over and lifted his other arm over my shoulder to help Steve out.
"Tony, we lost," Steve said.
"Is Ummm..." Tony struggles to ask about Pepper.
"Oh my god!" Pepper yells coming out of nowhere. She and Tony then embrace.
"It's okay." He says to her trying to calm her down. We all then turn and head back into the Avengers Compound.
In the Avengers Compound, we all sit in a living room area. Tony is sitting at a table, getting the blood for healing. I sit next to Steve as he pulls me into a sideways hug.
" I had a bad feeling about today, but I'm glad it was just Tony coming home," I whisper to Steve who pulled me closer to his body as Natasha began to speak.
"It's been 23 days since Thanos came to Earth. World governments are in pieces. The parts that are still working are trying to take a census. And it looks like he did... exactly what he said he was going to do. Thanos wiped out fifty percent, of all living creatures." She said.
"Where is he now? Where?" Tony asked
"We don't know," Steve said.
"He just opened a portal and walked through." Rocket said as I turned and looked at a sullen-looking Thor, sitting on a bench, seemingly deep in thought.
"What's wrong with him?" Tony said causing me to look back at the group.
"He's pissed. He thinks he failed." I said to Tony.
"Which of course he did, but there's a lot of that goin' round, ain't there?" Rocket said.
"Honestly, until this exact second, I thought you were a Build-A-Bear," Tony said.
"Maybe I am." Rocket said crossing his arms.
"We've been hunting Thanos for three weeks now. Deep Space scans and satellites and we got nothing." Natasha said changing the subjects.
"Tony, you fought him?" Steve asked.
"Who told you that? I didn't fight him. No, he wiped my face with a planet while the Bleecker Street Magician gave away the stone. That's what happened. There was no fight." Tony said back.
"Did he give you any clues, any coordinates, anything?" Steve asked calmly as he could tell Tony was getting worked up.
"Pfft! I saw this coming a few years back. I had a vision. I didn't wanna believe it. Thought I was dreaming." Tony said.
"Tony, I'm gonna need you to focus," Steve said stepping closer to Tony.
"And I needed you. As in past tense. That trumps what you need. It's too late buddy. Sorry. You know what I need?" Tony said. He stands and then pushing things off the table with a clatter. We all wince at the noise.
"I need to shave. And I believe I remember telling you, Cap." Tony said. He then goes for Steve. Rhodey quickly comes in front of him, trying to stop him. I stand up from my seat. Steve turns to me and gives me a look that tells me to stay where I am.
"Tony, Tony, Tony, stop!" Rhodey says.
"Otherwise what we needed was a suit of armor around the world! Remember that? Whether it impacted our precious freedom or not- that's what we needed!" Tony says.
"Well, that didn't work out, did it?" Steve said back.
"I said, "we'll lose". You said, "We'll do that together too." And guess what, cap? We lost. You weren't there. But that's what we do, right? Our best work after the fact? We're the Avengers, we're the Avengers. Not the Prevengers, right?" Tony says.
"Okay, you made your point. Just sit down, ok?" Rhodey says still holding Tony back.
"Nah, Nah, Nah. Here's my point." Tony says as he pushes away from Rhodey.
"Sit down!" Rhodey says to Tony, who ignores him. Instead, he turns to Carol and points at her.
"She's great, by the way. We need you. You're new blood." Tony says.
"Tony!" Rhodey calls out.
"Bunch of tired old mills! I got nothing for you, cap! I got no coordinates, no clues, no plan, no options. Zero. Zip. Nada. No trust. Liar." Tony says to Steve. I look over at Steve and see that he looks affected by Tony's words. The old friends just gaze at each other. After a moment, Tony rips his Arc Reactor from his chest and shoves it into Steve's hand.
"Here, take this. You find him, and you put that on. You hide." Tony says as he then falls to the ground. Steve is by his side and everyone is starting to gather.
"Tony!" Steve says no knowing whether to touch him and help or just kneel there.
"I'm fine. I..." Tony drifts off. He then falls into a heap, unconscious.