The Billionaire's Wife

Chapter 20

I smiled, amused. "Then I need the bottle please." I had my hand held out and dad happily gave me the bottle.

"Don't be too hard on yourself." Dad said as I was pouring myself a glass full.

"I'm not. I'm just--celebrating! Yeah. Because I gave him 24 hours for him to sign the papers. He will definitely sign those!" I gulped half way.

"Madison--"

"Everything's going to be okay, dad! The three of us can start life all over again, what do you say?" I enthusiastically said.

"Madison, I know you still love him. And I know how hard this is for you." His words felt like I was thrown into an ice bath.

I sat back down and placed my glass of wine down. "I don't know what else to do, dad. What should I do?"

"Just remember to take it easy, sweetheart. Don't be too hard on yourself please." Dad was practically begging me at this point.

"I've been too much, haven't I?"

Dad's sad eyes locked with mine. "Of all people, Madison, you're the one who knows what to do best. If you need any help, I'm just here. I'm here to do all I can to support you this time. Just tell me what you want to do."

Taking in dad's words, I nodded. "You're right."

He kisses me on the head and started to head upstairs. "Will you be okay down here by yourself?"

I rolled my eyes at how it sounded sarcastic at my perspective. "I've survived more than a decade. What's another few hours?" then I immediately finish my glass of wine and poured myself another.

My world came together and started to crumble all at once as well. Everything has really been a dream and a nightmare. One day you're celebrating and mourning at the next. It was too much. If I give up now, it wouldn't be right. I wanted to, but I simply couldn't. I was already in Will's mess of a life. At the back of my mind, even if he would be signing the divorce papers, it would be useless. I couldn't escape the exposure, the attention, everything. Even if William will be able to legally agree with the separation, it wasn't the separation I was longing for.

Will will always be a part of my life no matter what. All the good and bad combined.

Love is not a feeling, it's a decision.

I was spinning my phone in my hand until I opened my secret folder and glued my eyes on the screen. Looking at my little angel's lifeless but beautiful body send knives to my heart. I cannot fathom the emotions I am experiencing right now. I was feeling a whirlwind of emotions and numbness at the same time.

I remember the moment Dr. Watson handed her to me.

She was too perfect for this world.

She has the most beautiful face I ever laid on.

Things change once you go through these kind of things. Once of which is your perspective on life. It becomes very contradictory. You mourn for the life lost, but at the same time you feel grateful for being able to experience the life being temporarily lent to us.

Never did a moment pass that I never thought of her. Maybe I'm just in that phase, but I don't know. There's no one to tell me if it's right or wrong. Let nature take its course, they say, but never forget the really important things in life.

The doorbell rang and I scoffed. Who would actually ruin my moment at this hour?

I practically dragged myself to the door. The moment the door opened, my intoxication disappeared and adrenaline started to rush.

"Did you sign it?" I asked Will. "Because if you didn't, I won't let you in."

He nods his head slowly with a facial expression I couldn't understand. He retrieves the paperwork from the envelope he was holding and showed me his signatures over printed name, page by page.

This was what I wanted, but why am I crying all of a sudden?

"Hey." He puts the papers back in the envelope and tries to hold me.

"Please, don't." I stopped him by stepping back. His embrace makes it harder for me.

"Madison, I'm sorry. Please let me."

"No." I muffled.

"Please." William Thompson was on his knees at the door with tears in his eyes, begging to hold me.

"You don't have any right to get near me anymore." Guarding myself, it was the only way.

William didn't move. He was still on his knees and his head bowed.

"Will, please don't do this." I told him, but it's as if I said nothing. He was like a frozen statue waiting for ends to meet.

"Please listen to me one last time." his voice cracked as he was still in his position.

The moment he said those words, I felt my heart rip apart in pieces I couldn't see anymore. 

"Please." he whispers.

"What?" I whispered back. "What would change everything back to the way it was before, Will?"

Then one of my worst weaknesses happens. I saw a tear dampen the door rug followed by another, and another, and another, until sobs were coming out of Will. "I have the money, but I can never buy the time to go back in time to make things right, and maybe change one thing or two. You have no idea how much I want to give everything away to just go back in time, Madison.

"Even with the wealth I have right now, I feel like I have lost everything I hold dearly. I made mistakes, and I admit that. That's why I signed the papers. When I met you, I knew I had everything I ever wanted and more, but that's not the case anymore. I knew it was the best thing to do.

"I never did anything right in my life, Madison, but since you came, you were the only thing right that happened to me. Now I, myself, pushed you away from me. I never considered myself a good or worthy person of anything, but then I met you and the way I saw things drastically changed.

"The last thing I wanted to do was hurt you, but I have. I can't keep on hurting you. I won't tell you to do things anymore. It's your life, Madison. But please. Please keep everything I gave you. It's only a small token for all the mistakes I've done. And one last thing, please always remember that even if we're apart, I will always, truly, deeply, love you no matter what decision you make in your life. May you find someone who will treat you better than I do."

"Will."

His bloodshot eyes look straight on mine. "Yes?"

I should choose my next words carefully because words are too powerful.

**

Author's Note: SO WHICH DIRECTION WILL THIS GO TO?

Hello, loves! It's been quite some time, and yes, I did not abandon you. I'm still here. It's just been busy and I have been through the most challenging times of my life so far, I hope you can bear with me. It's just been a difficult few months of my life, and I am grateful for the genuine people who were there for me no matter what. Thank you for keeping me sane. It's been crazy.

I haven't fully recovered yet, but I'm taking one day at a time.

I appreciate everyone who unconditionally stays tune to this book. I don't know how to thank you all.

Love lots,

WanderingDancer x

To mon petite ange in heaven, you're always in my heart.

(March 8, 2020; 5:30pm)