(1378 words) Recently Tae has been busy and we haven't spent much time together. he's working on a solo album so he's had a lot on his mind. He eats then goes to bed. Today I made his favorite meal and dressed nicer than usual just to give him a nice relaxing dinner, trying to be a good girlfriend. When he got home I tried to give him a hug but he was stiff so I pulled away Me - welcome home Tae, I made some food He grumbled and sat and ate the food quickly Me - so hows work Tae - stressful, I don't want to talk about it Me - oh ok We ate in silence. Then I cleaned up dinner. When we went to bed he pushed me away from him and didn't cuddle me. He turned away from me, feeling a little sad I tried to not take it too personally, just he's tired. I curled up in a ball trying to sleep but kept having to change my position, I couldn't sleep. He holds me almost every night I got used to being cuddled. Sighing I got up and went to the couch. At least I'll have something against my back. I managed to get some sleep but even then woke up early and with a sore back. Giving up on sleeping I changed and fixed breakfast. As I finished dishing out food he came down. Me - hey bae, sleep well V - no Me - oh well I made some food He just gave the food a look. He glanced up to me and I saw something but he turned away before I could figure out what he was thinking V - I have to go He left without another word. I packaged most the food I didn't finish and ate some. I could barely eat tho feeling really left out. Stop feeling sad, he's just stressed and tired, he doesn't mean to do that. My Tae is caring. ~taes point of view~ My mind is so full of work and being exhausted and I'm trying to keep my distance or I'll lash out at her. But I did struggle sleeping last night so I noticed she left. I felt bad about it but it would be worse if I stay close to her. I'll make it up once we get through this sore spot. This morning I noticed the bags under her eyes, I felt so bad but left before I made it worse ~back to yours~ Determined to get my Tae back when he got home I gave him a hug. But again he was stiff Me - hey I was thinking maybe tonight we can play a game or something fun. What do you think? He just gave me an annoyed look V - No, I've got enough on my mind. I don't have time I did my best not to look upset. He walked to the kitchen and grabbed some food ignoring me. He sat on the couch and I thought I'd try to give him a massage, a friend taught me a while ago. When I started he didn't say anything then he set his food down roughly and got up and looked down at me annoyed V - why are you being so annoying, just leave me alone. I've had a long day I don't have time for you, go away! You are so needy! He looked at me with so much hate and anger, I cowered down a bit. Me - I-I'm sorry i just thought V - SHUT UP just let me be alone! he moved his arm a bit, but a bit too much and I flinched, moving away from him a bit and shutting my eyes. I glanced up at him scared, ive never felt this type of fear from someone I loved. i held myself together but when I looked to him again his facial expression was different, it was regret V - oh god (y/n) I'm so sorry, I'd ... you gotta believe... I'd never hit you. I'm sorry He went to hug me but when he touched me I flinched again. My heart racing I tried to tell myself Tae wouldn't hurt me but that look he gave me a second ago popped into my head. I stepped back and wrapped my arms around myself Me - I-I know you wouldn't intentionally hit me I kept my feeling to myself and made sure to be out of his reach. Me - I-I'll leave you be V - no (y/n) please I turned and dodged his hands and went the bathroom. I shut the door in his face and walked backwards to the adjacent wall. Sliding down the wall I sat on the floor and let my tears fall. I tried to cry silently with my head in my hands. V - (y/n) please let me in I didn't trust my voice so I just shook my head but he couldn't see me. V - I'm so sorry I've been distant, I'm sorry my actions made you even begin to think I'd hit you. Please let me in I got up and looked at myself in the mirror. I tried to control my tears but they kept coming along with his words. Annoying and get out, I'm just a burden. I slid back down to the ground and cried. V could hear me this time even tho I tried to be silent. He looked around found a hair clip. I was so engrossed in my thoughts I missed that he was unlocking the door. I had my head in my hands and knees to my chest and just let the tears flow. I didn't notice what was happening till the door opened. My head snapped up and I saw Tae, tears still running down my face Me - I-I'm fine, you want to be alone right, I can leave, I'll try not to be annoying He got down on his knees and slowly got closer to me and reached out for me. I looked at his hand and saw his strong hands, a hand that would hurt if hit with. I shook my head, no this is Tae he wouldn't. I looked up to his face, my Tae's face, he wouldn't hurt me. I didn't flinch when he touched me this time and I heard him sigh in relief. He scooted closer to me and wrapped his arms around me. V - I'll take tomorrow off, we can spend together Me - no you need to practice and finish your album, I'll be fine V - I know you will but I've been a terrible boyfriend and I'm going to make it up I glanced up to him, I probably look like shit with puffy eyes and tear stains. He gave me a small smile and using his thumb wiped my tears away. I snuggled into his chest and steadied my breathing and trying to stop my crying V - I'm so sorry (y/n). I never wanted to hurt you, I'm sorry I let out a chocked sob and gripped his sweatshirt. Getting a hold of myself I pulled away Me - I'm sorry I'm getting you hoodie all wet V - I don't care about the jacket, come here He put me back where I was and stroked my hair. V - lets just stay home and watch movies and cuddle, hows that sound I sniffled and looked up at him Me - that sounds nice When we got up, after I finally got control of my emotions, I said Me - I'm sorry I haven't been the best girlfriend V - what are you talking about, you are the best Me - you'd come home stressed and nothing I could do helped, I was just trying to help and then I'm the one that ends up being taken care of I bowed me head, I was suppose to be supporting him and here we are, him helping me V - no I was being awful, you did everything right. I'll be better next time, I was taking my anger and stress out on you. I'm the one to blame. Me - ok He went off and called RM getting the day off and we spent the next day cuddling and watching tv. He was back to normal and extra sweet to make sure I knew he would never hurt me.
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