Devotion (Thorin/OC)

Chapter 19 Not a nightmare

"I-I don't know..." I answered truthfully.

"What's troubling ye?"

"It's something about my people, something that...is hard to a explain." I sighed.

"Well! ye might as well try" Balin chuckled, his wise old eyes twinkling. I looked at him sceptically, but tried any way.

"Well..my kind are...very, passionate, we feel each and every emotion ten times as much as any other race. When we are happy, were ecstatic. When were sad, were heart broken, and when we love...oh Balin, there are no words. Because of this, every thing we do is effected by these emotions. For example, if we were on the battle field, and we saw a loved one die-" my voice cracked a little as I thought about my family "- it would take away a piece of your very soul. Something you could never get back. But, there is a bond even deeper. It's called the...Rezon." I paused, allowing Balin to take the information in. To credit the dwarf, I was feeling slightly better talking to him. After a moment, he nodded for me to continue.

" Translated it means: The bond...it's deeper then anything you could imagine. It's...it's something my kind would spend their entire lives searching for. Some would never find it, but others... My mother found hers- my father. You see, the Rezon isn't a physical bond, more of a... I'm not sure how to explain it, but basically it links the souls and life forces of two beings. Not by force, no, although we do not choose who we share the Rezon with. My mother once told me of the feeling of finding your Rezon, your Leafdeh. She said, it was like she had been seeing the world in black and white before she met my father but all of a sudden she was seeing all these colour. Like the world was in a different light. She told me her heart felt like it would burst from the love she felt for him in the matter of seconds. She felt like she had found her other half. We express the union by marking them or claiming them." My eyes trailed over to Thorin, I was surprised he hadn't woken up from my sudden movement before, but surly, he was still asleep.

"And have you found yours?" Balin asked curiously. I snapped my head round to look at him, my eyes wide.

"W-what ?" I stuttered, making Balin chuckle.

"The way you spoke of this..Er..bond. It made me think you have found yours. Well , have you?" I looked down then over at Thorin. A soft smile reached my lips.

"Yes, I have" I whispered to myself.

"It's him, isn't it?" Balin asked softly, making me panic.

"I-I-"

"I've seen how you look at him, it makes me think of how I looked at my wife long ago" I looked down, unwilling to answer.

"Do dwarves have anything like that ? A Rezon I mean?" I asked, changing the subject. Balin smiled instantly.

"Aye, but not on the same level as your kind. We dwarves call our lovers, our one. As with you, we do not choose who we love, we believe it is a choice made before we are born. When we find them, we know instantly, and our world just becomes...complete. We mark the union by plating our ones hair to symbolise our claim on them, giving them a mark if you will" Balin smiled softly, his mind taking him back to old memories. I felt bad taking him from them, but I wanted to know more.

"Is a...one for life?"

"Yes" Balin said quietly, his eyes and smile becoming sad.

"Who is your one" I asked, trying to lighten his mood.

"She was called Velen"

Was, the word that slapped me in the face. Balins' one was gone?

"Oh Balin i-"

"It's alright lass, you didn't know"

We sat in silence for a little before Balin spoke again.

"What happens if one of the...Rezon...dies. You said if a loved one dies, a piece of soul is taken, but what about one of the Rezon." My face became grim and depressed. I didn't like thinking about Thorin dying. I would protect him till I was lying on my death bed.

"Well...usually if the Rezon is just between two of my kin, then they both die... But if the two were from different races, say a skin changer and a dwarf... I do not know. Never has here been another Rezon between any other race except my kind. Until now" I added quietly, looking over at Thorin.

" I see..." Balin said softly, letting us both descend into silence. However, it didn't last long.

"I'll take this watch Balin, go get some rest!" I laughed, seeing the grateful look Balin sent me. He hesitated, but I waved him off. Soon he was fast asleep with the others. I sighed, thinking back to my dream. I knew this would only become worse over time until I couldn't control the beast any more, but I couldn't do it. I didn't want to tell him in case of...rejection. I shuddered at the thought. I hadn't mentioned rejection or the horror stories I'd heard as a child.

Rejection to us skin changers was like a fate worse then death. It was almost unheard of, but still it sometimes happened.

Rejection was something that happened between two leafdehs' or mates in the common tongue. If one rejected the other, the rejector would be free, but the rejected would die a slow painful death. It would start slowly, senses gradually becoming dulled down, skin becoming rough and grey etc, eventually leaving skeleton of the person past self. Then their soul would be torn in half, leaving a hollow shell which would eventually give up on its own. The thought of going through this terrified me. I glanced over at Thorin as he groaned in his sleep. He wouldn't do that would he? I frowned as Thorin mumbled something in his sleep, then rolled over, his jaw clenched and his brows furrowed.

Was he okay?

I stood and hurried over to him, jumping over bodies as I went. When I reached him, he growled in his sleep, the sound wild and...lustful? No, no. He was having a night mare...I think.

Thorin wake up!" I whispered, shaking him lightly. He groaned again, rolling over so he was closer to me. In a way, it made me smile. He moaned again snapping me out if my daze.

"Thorin!" I whispered louder, placing a hand on his cheek. He leaned into it, making me smile like a fool. He moaned once more, mumbling a few words. Now I was getting slightly annoyed. Why couldn't I wake him up?! I knelt beside him, placing my hands on both of his shoulders.

"Thori-" before I could even finish my sentence I found myself trapped beneath Thorin, my hands over my head, pinned. My breath caught in my throat as I stared in to Thorins ice blue eyes they were glazed over as if he hadn't fully woken up yet.

"Luka..." He growled softly, his pupils unfocused. Yep He was still slightly dreaming. With his body pressed against mine, pinning me, I had a hard time keep myself from marking him or...something else. I let out a small whimper as He leaned closer. I wriggled beneath him, trying to free myself. I was losing control!

"Luka..." He growled again, his voice rough from sleep. I froze as I felt his member against my thigh.

"Thorin..." I whispered, slightly scared. I was what you would call a...Virgin. So with Thorin above me, and his member making quiet a big appearance, I had no idea what to do. Even the beast had gone quiet.

"Thorin!" I yelped as he leaned in and his lips brushed mine. That seemed to do it. His eyes that had been glossed over with sleep, focused as did his pupils. He frowned, then his eyes went wide and he let go of me, leaping up whilst taking off his coat and holding over his erm...problem. I lay dazed for a moment, my emotions drowning me. But after a second, I sat up. I was breathing heavily, and my face was bright red. I looked up a Thorin, who looked equally as stunned. He met my eyes, before he walked off, out of the fire light. I took a deep breath and stood.

I knew one thing at least, Thorin had not been having a night mare.

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Okay so...? I'll update again soon as I can, I'm so sorry about the wait, but i can promise I will finish all of my books ;) vote, comment you give me the will to write! xx

A.J.Donovan