His words ring in my ears. I can't digest the information he threw up in discussion. He said them so maliciously that I want to believe he was lying. But there was something in the way he looked at me that let me know he wasn't.
I should've known. I guess I didn't pick up on the signs, and they were all there. I see that now. She'd lie to me about where she was or where she was going. She'd gloss over not being home when I called her from the road. She would switch off her cellular whenever we were together. Things that I didn't question at the time, but now I'm analyzing until it drives me crazy. I should've picked up on all those things before. But I wouldn't believe she'd ever cheat on me.
She's my world. She's everything I thought I'd ever need, and I thought I was that for her. We laughed together when we had good times. We cried together when we had bad times. We made plans for our future. She has my heart, I love her so much, and I never thought she could hurt me so badly. But it hurts for me to breath. My chest feels too small to accommodate my breaking heart.
I'm walking around the streets still dazed, feeling like if I don't find somewhere to sit down soon I'm just going to fall down. It hurts to keep breathing. I can't stand this pain.
Finding a bench in the empty park, I drop down onto it somewhat numb and take in the silence surrounding me. Immediately my eyes sting and I start to cry. My tears plaster my cheeks and drop to my lap where my hands rest. How could she break me like this? I somehow feel less the man I was this morning.
As I break down into an uncontrollable sob the heavens open, as though feeling my pain, and rain saturates me to the skin almost instantly. Still I sit there replaying things in my head. It's pure torture. But as hard as I try, I can't think of anything else.
How could I have been so damn blind and stupid? Guess my trust in her stretched too far because she didn't think enough of me not to mess around. But I had no reason to doubt her. I trusted her, completely. She promised herself to me, so how could she betray that promise by being with another guy?
My stomach churns and, as soon as they started, the tears stop. My heartache swiftly becoming anger when I think of that morning before I left the house. She kissed me goodbye. She used the lips she'd used to betray me with another man, to kiss me. She'd kissed me with her tainted cheating lips that morning like everything was exactly the way it was before I went away.
Taking a deep breath I climb to my feet and head home, where I know she'll be.
You were my sun, you were my earth
But you didn't know all the way's I loved you, no
So you took a chance and made other plans
But I bet you didn't think that they would come crashing down, no
You don't have to say what you did
I already know, I found out from him
Now there's just no chance for you and me
There'll never be
Don't it make you sad about it?
You told me you loved me, why did you leave me all alone
Now you tell me you need me when you call me on the phone
Girl I refuse, you must have me confused with some other guy
Your bridges were burned, now it's your turn to cry
Cry me a river
Cry me a river, girl
