At The Crossing - A Short Story

Chapter Two

I was really all kinds of reckless tonight.

I looked away from his dark, penetrating gaze, afraid to see more than I was strong for, and fought to hold myself together as the familiar feel of Adam’s arms around me threatened to reduce me to a sobbing, stuttering mess. 

He said nothing at first, just pulled me closer to him until my cheek pressed against his chest, his chin tucked just behind my ear. I bit my lower lip to stifle a gasp of tears, my eyes squeezing shut as the pressure behind my eyes built. 

I never realized just how cold I’d felt this whole time until I re-discovered the warmth and security he’d always been ready to wrap me in. No matter what I did, it would seem that I would always be welcome. I was undeserving, of course, but it didn’t matter.

In the end, we were all undeserving, in some measure or another, because no one would ever be perfect enough to never screw it up at least once, but it was no reason not to love. Until we realized this, like I did tonight as I retraced the path I’d long abandoned, we would never be able to love hard, much and well. 

The only real injustice we could ever do love is to take it for granted. Until you care enough about what you could lose, you will continue to sabotage it.

“I’m only this good if its for the only girl I want,” he murmured, his voice hinting at a smile. “Just like you, my best version is the one I am with you.”

I grinned in spite of myself and clutched Adam’s shoulder just as I felt a light, airy kiss on my hair.

I couldn’t say how long we danced—tonight, time seemed as endless as a moment on standstill—but eventually, the cassette tape reached its end. 

Adam tipped his head back to look at me, his lips so close my next breath could almost be a kiss.

“We can’t stay here forever,” he said.

I swallowed hard and nodded. 

Of course, we couldn’t. That would be too easy.

“Do you want to stay?” he asked almost shyly. “In Westfall, I mean. For a little bit, anyway.”

My throat was tight but I forced a smile, my words more honest that I expected. “I want to stay. I don’t think I’ve ever wanted to stay here as much as I do tonight.”

Adam’s mouth curved into a smile, his eyes bright. “We can drive to the old barn. Just like old times.”

He had the nervous energy of a boy about to go on his first date, reminding me much of the night when Adam came over to my house to pick me up for a movie he’d talked me into seeing the day before. I was still putting my hair up in a ponytail when I yelled at him to come on in. When I was finally presentable in jeans, a plaid shirt and sneakers, I stepped out to the living room to find him there pacing. He’d cleaned up nicely, wearing dark jeans and a new sweater, his hair freshly cut and combed back. He was also clutching a small clump of pink and white lilies. When he saw me, he halted in his mindless circling around our old coffee table and opened his mouth as if to say something after he’d looked me over, but no sound came out. Instead he strode over to me and handed me the flowers with no explanation. The only thing he said, as I stared puzzled at the flowers, was that we had to go or we’d be late for the movie. This had been a few months before we kissed by the lake, and I hadn’t really realized then what Adam had been going through as he sat there stiffly in the movie house at first. He only relaxed after a shaky laugh when I accidentally knocked my popcorn over and spilled it all over his lap, dusting his new pair of pants with yellow cheese powder.

I grinned. “I’d like that very much.”

His eyes held a sparkle even as he released me and stepped back. “Okay, let me grab my stuff and we’re out of here. Did you bring your car over? ‘Coz if you did, I’ll pick it up tomorrow.”