You know those moments when you look around and all you see is happy people and families and animals and jus happy everything and the sun is shining and birds are chirping, everyone's laughing and smiling even the students, teachers,business people, hell even the janitors but your just sitting there feeling like you got hit by a train then run over by a truck and thrown from the top of a building and to top it off all your worst enemies and nightmares merged into one and decided to haunt you till the end of time?
Yh that feeling. That's how I feel so much of the time and it hurts feeling like that. I hate it. It feels like Mother Nature woke up and thought "ya kno what! imma make this girls/guys life hell coz I feel like karma should go all out on her/his ass today" like WTF DID I DO!!!
We all get those moments and it just sucks absolute ass at times. But sometimes, sometimes we welcome it. We let it in, let it overtake us, become us. We let it take control and it feels good. But at the same time we feel weak for it. Feel weak for succumbing to the darkness, The shadows living within us. But it happens anyway, wether you want it to or not, eventually you let it in and jus let go for a bit. Or for ages. It depends on the situation and how bad the damage is, how bad the pain hurts, how deep the cuts go, how long the scars show.
Im all too familiar with scars. Others and my own. They stay forever. If not physically then mentally and the scars are worse than the original cause of them. The scars are a constant reminder. A constant headache that never relents, jeering at you, a curse , a result of the weakness. A token from hell to let you know that the devil ain't done yet.
KAMU SEDANG MEMBACA
RANDOM SH*T
AcakI jus need to clear my head sometimes and if I can't use a pen and paper I'll type it up. These are some of my thoughts and feelings and things I do when I'm bored.
