Soul Mates

Chapter 7

         And pulled back and I felt cold seeping into my bones without her warmth. I got up slowly and walked or rather dragged myself to my room. I stood in front of my mirror, of my reflection and looked into it and then my eyes watered up but I tried to hold it back.
Just a heartbeat later a tear broke free, and the rest followed in an unbroken stream. I bent forward and held the table in front of the mirror so tightly that the wood seemed to break the bones in my hand but I didn’t care. My heart was broken beyond repair. I couldn’t breathe properly. The air was heavy around me and I was on my knees and I was crying harder. I was breaking down and I was all alone.
10 minutes passed when I felt my phone vibrate, although my head was about to explode with headache and I was continuously wiping the tears still rolling down my cheeks one after another, but I picked the call without looking at who’s call was it. “hello.” I managed to say and all was quiet at the other end. “Are you okay Alexander?” said a familiar voice after a while that made my heart skip a beat. I didn’t know what to say.
I was embarrassed too much to even to breathe. I knew Magnus noticed from my breaking voice that I was crying. “Can we meet? I want to talk to you.” He said after a while and waited for a reply and I didn’t know why but I nodded. Obviously he couldn’t see me but I wasn’t able to speak. He again waited for a while before finally saying “I’ll be waiting for you at my apartment. Please come if you feel like it.” And hung up. “Magnus-” I breathed helplessly and put down the phone.
In the evening I washed up before going to him. I was in terrible condition and it would be much worse if he sees me like this.

Magnus’ P.O.V
It was almost evening of the next day when I heard a knock at my door. I felt him across the door before I opened it up to see him fresh as always, just as the evening breeze, but something was wrong. He was alert as usual but something was odd about the way he came in and turned to look at me and I felt it more than I saw it. Something was missing in my heart. It was hollowed and it was breaking to see Alec in front of me and knowing I can’t come any closer to him.
I looked away before he could see the longing and pure love for him in my eyes. “You seem like you could use a drink.” I looked up to wink at him. “Please.” He turned to the balcony without noticing the humour and I let it stay that way and summoned a glass of wine for him in a heartbeat. He turned and took it from me and sipped from it before asking “Why you called?”
  I looked at the floor and tried to form words. To say something but I wanted to be careful and started “Alec I-.” but I was shocked as he wiped a tear rolling down his cheek and gulped down the wine. I stepped closer to him, very carefully. “I can feel something is wrong.” I continued anyway watching him very closely. I took another step towards him. “I can feel you are hurting.” I told him and he asked “How?” his voice breaking.
It broke my heart to see him so vulnerable. I just met him the fourth time and he was crying in front of me. “Because I’m connected to you in a way. I know when you feel happy or sad or broken. I know when you are angry and I can feel it when you are in love.” I explained and he looked at me with those blue eyes that were watery and tears were rolling down his cheeks one after another. “Magnus I- I don’t know what to do. I jus- I never thought that it would happen.” He was shaking his head when I stepped even closer to him. I couldn’t help but wipe away the tears and he was shocked at first and then realized what I was doing and backed away from me. “Don’t. I came because I thought you had something important to talk about.” was all he said before turning to leave.
“Alec.” I called for him and he stopped dead. “I know you have responsibilities and it could affect your family but you are not responsible for everything. You have to live too. What about…love? Even shadowhunters fall in love Alec.” I saw that he was trying hard to hold the tears back. It must be Jace. He must have been in love with someone. Nothing else could have broken Alec this much. It was making sense now. He blinked at me and I continued however “Just tell me you can’t fall in love and I’ll stop.”

Alec’s P.O.V
“You have to live too. What about…love? Even shadowhunters fall in love Alec.” I wasn’t exactly sure if I was breathing. He was using clear words. I don’t know why I even came here but now that I was here I couldn’t move as he spoke, I just stared at him and he said “Just tell me you can’t fall in love and I’ll stop.” I tried to look away from him but I couldn’t tear away my gaze
I couldn’t find words to say anything as well “I- I don’t know. Why do you keep pushing? The- y-you’re jus- You’re confusing me!” I turned again to leave, frustrated at the loss of words. But Magnus spoke again and I turned back “Confusion is part of it. That’s how you find out that something’s there.” He walked towards me slowly and I stood there still as a statue. “Emotions are never black and white. They are more like….symptoms.” he continued walking and speaking to me.
He started walking around me seductively and I wasn’t even able to breathe “You lose your breath every time they enter a room.” I tore my gaze away from him as he walked behind me and I knew I couldn’t breathe, or breathe properly. He snapped his fingers and there was a thud and Magus continued to walk around me while saying “Your heart beats faster when they walk by.” I felt my heart thunderous under my hand. That’s when I realized I was checking my heartbeat and I quickly took my hand off my chest blushing slightly.
“Your skin tingles when they stand close enough to feel their breath.” He whispered and a shiver went down my spine as he breathed on the back of my neck. I turned to look at him to find him so close to me that I wanted to back away a little but couldn’t and he spoke again “I know you feel what I feel Alec.” He said as if frustrated.

Magnus’ P.O.V
I was acting like my usual self with Alec for the first time and I knew it wouldn’t end well but he needed to know. He needed to know what I actually felt. As expected he replied coldly “You don’t have any clue what I feel, so back off.” He turned to leave again but stopped and turned again to say “It’s all just a game to you, isn’t it? You flirt, you laugh, you use magic…but at the end of the day, what do you risk? Even if I did feel the same for you, you want me to give up my LIFE for you? I have to what’s right for ME. I could lose my family, my career, EVERYTHING!” his words were breaking my heart but I just stood there enduring each and every one of it.
He was hurt and it wasn’t fair if I would fight him as well. If this would make him feel any better I could take it. For him. He shook his head in frustration and said “You just don’t get it.” Even though I listened to everything with patience, he should know something too so I told him “You have a choice to make.” And he turned to leave but stopped and I said “I will not ask again.” And left the room.

Alec’s P.O.V
I turned around to see Magnus wasn’t there. I felt something warm trickle at my arm so I rolled up my sleeves to find a rune glowing. I wasn’t able to breathe even as it glowed for 5 minutes and faded off to become a normal rune, just brighter than the others. I stood there for an hour only to realize I was still at Magnus’ apartment. I left immediately and found myself on the bridge again. I looked at my rune. My love rune. I was in love with Magnus Bane.