Lost

Prologue

I walk down the hall to my room, my eyes tear stained. I open my door and quietly shut it behind me. I drop my backpack on the floor and sit on my bed staring at the wall.

Silent tears flow back down my raw cheeks as I stare wide eyed at the wall.

The house is silent, Moms out, probably getting drunk, Dad's at work.

I think of my little brother Andrew but he's at school. Nothing's stopping me. No ones here to stop me. I have what I would need. I sigh and think. I have no friends at school. Not after today...

I sit like that for 10 minuets.

You're loosing time.

I stand slowly and make my way towards my bathroom.

How? There's so many ways.

My mind drifts back to Andrew. He's to young, he won't even understand what happened. I'm sure mom will try, and fail to explain it. Leaving dad with the difficult task of explaining why his sister isn't here anymore.

I open the medicine cabinet. Two main options. Drugs and Razors. My hand glides around before I decide on both.

I pull out the bottle of prescribed pain pills I had left over from when I broke my arm. I look in the bottle. About 32 left... that'll be enough. I pull out my usual ardor from under my face cream and run it under hot water.

I turn around and close and lock my bathroom door. I sigh and look back at the sink, years still flowing freely from my eyes.

I open the bottle of pills. Swallowing them all. I fill up the pill bottle with water and swallow that to get the few stuck in my throat. No going back now.

I stand there for about 15 minuets, looking at myself in the mirror. I start feeling dizzy so I pick up the razor.

Placing it to my wrist, I slide it gently across. Testing. I literally feel nothing.

I push it harder against my wrist again and pull slowly across, probably leaving an inch deep cut in it's wake.

The blood instantly starts pouring from my arm and I place the razor next to it. I repeat this 4 times and remember my letter. I walk out of the bathroom and open my drawer, getting blood everywhere and not caring. I pull out the letter leaving a bloody handprint at the bottom. I place it on my bed and walk back to the bathroom.

I take the razor and place it on my wrist one last time, hovering over my vein. I close my eyes and think of what happened today. Before I know it, it's pushed against my white skin and crimson stains the surface.

I didn't feel the other ones and I didn't really feel this one either, but I felt the vein in my wrist pop. Blood pools at my feet and the world spins. I blink and I'm on the ground. My hair and clothes soaked in blood. I smile sadly up at the ceiling as my vision fades to black.

I'm sorry. I mouth up at the dusty light above me.

My smile drops, my eyes close. And I take one last painless breath before allowing death to take me.