Conquering Feelings

Prologue:

"You're just my BESTFRIEND"

Yeah!!! I'm just his bestfriend. I'm always be, how can I forgot that statement of him if he always said it in front of anybody else.

I'm always there whenever he's in trouble, but he always end up saying "You're just my bestfriend, you're just NOTHING"

I, Katrina Vienn Laxanie...

whose deeply and madly fallen in love with my most arrogant, selfish, heartless and most jerk bestfriend, AeiOu Klynd Fuertes.

I wish my feelings for him is like an on-off button. That everytime I've rejected by him, I can switch it off and give this button to those people that can give me back what I feel.

I want to feel importance by him, importance that not only because I'm his BESTFRIEND, importance that he feel romantic love through me.

I'm too naive about love when he becomes my bestfriend, and together with that when the days come and go I always feel like I don't want him as just my bestfriend.

Then time comes that I knew I fall in love with him. Now I'm not naive anymore about love but it not that easy, I fall in love,and now I always encounter this pain in my heart, they called it HEARTBREAK.

My bestfriend can't love me back romanticly the way I do.

Love with no pain is not worth it, but if its already too much try your very best to stop loving that person because thay don't deserve your love. They always keep on saying that words to me but it end up NOTHING.

I can't let go of my feelings towards him, I don't know why.

Until one day... All my puppy heartbreaks turn into almost perfect relationship.

"Damn Ms. Katrina Vienn Laxanie! Don't ever dare turn your back on me. Damn! Damn! I can't take it anymore. I love you! Yes I did and I am so stupid to make myself fell out of love on you because I'm scared! I'm scared to lose my bestfriend. So many what if run through my mind what if.. What if... F*ck..." he shout at me and that caught me off on guard. Im shocked. Totally shocked. I don't Know what ro do or say.

Naramdaman ko nalng na malapit na siya sakin at niyakap ako patalikod. " I don't want to lose my bestfriend so much and I will never ever want to lose you as well. You know that I'm a mess." and with that hinarap niya ako. I see his eyes, it's full of.. full of I don't know either. I can't recognize his expression.

And the most thing that really caught me on guard is the tears that fell in his right cheeks. That make my eyea grow really wide.

But...

That one day also brings too much heartbreak... True heartbreak that make my whole system almost gave up. It is also the reason why I also change.

How can I conquer my feelings toward him??? I don't really know.