Yaoi Rants and Wonders

How are they always prepared?

So you know how when it's getting to that really good part and you have to keep your poker face on the whole time. And it goes like:

Mark found this completely unexpected! Here he was with his best friend from childhood, who he's had a crush on forever! Ash lays him on the bed and kisses him all over. Mark is a virgin and doesn't know what to do next so he just lays there enjoying himself. Lucky they were at Mark's house so he felt more comfortable. All of a sudden both are completely naked and Ash reaches over to the bed side table and grabs a bottle a lube and a condom.

Like. What.

First off...does Ash have magical powers or something cause I know for a fact getting your own clothes off let alone yours and someone else's is a challenge to begin with.

Second if this is your first time, Mark, why do you magically have a bottle of lube and a condom? I know you were thinking of the future and all, but really, you are not that lucky to where you just thought

'Hmmm maybe my best friend who I love more than a friend will go ass deep in me today when I see him! Aww well I'll get this anyway.'

Later that day.

'I guess I was right after all! Thanks magical ass senses, I owe you one. '

Then he chuckles, (because chuckling is manly as all hell) and goes to sleep by his new lover's side. Roll credits.