Star Polaris

chapter 1

There are so many things  said to be experienced in life pain, love, fear, losses, sadness, joy but these feelings are what make life, life, and mankind experience these feelings and more in their life time, some times we have these feelings without knowing we do they come in form of body signs
    I'm Clarie and I am black, I am a feminist I strongly believe that female should have the same privilege males have and should be treated equally, oh I almost forgot I am 18 years old, which means I am a young adult, I live with my mom who's divorced
    My dad calls sometimes and spend time with me, but that doesn't stop me from having these void feeling whenever he leaves.
       I am leaving home for college today and my mom won't quit talking about how proud she is and how shoes going to miss me lucky for me my uni is not far from home ( did anyone note the sarcasm)  so I have to visit weekends .
      I have taken all necessary stuff like toiletries, clothes and important stuff, even if I forgot anything I can easily drive back home.
     I am  standing at the front porch waiting for my so called friend who are supposed to pick me up at 3pm and now it's 4pm, really do they have to always be late.
    
     Here they come in a Mercedes Benz, I do not know what model it is but judging by the look it's gonna be fucking expensive , Emma and Mike are my best friends since high school, we applied and got in the same college although different courses

  Mike,  he's the owner of the cat, we always like to call him the rich one even though he  does not like it, he's dad runs a company or something like that l

Hey guys, do you really have to follow African time, you came late do you know how hard it is to listen to my  mom talk about her times in college and how to be safe.
  Sorry, Mike replied facing Emma,  someone stopped  to get ice-cream , given her evil glare
   Emma replied giving me a potty face, I am sorry babe you know how much I love ice-cream
    
       Whatever, just let go
  
      Mom ,I am leaving.   Okay baby, she replied rushing out to give me a life threatening hug before saying don't forget to call when you get on campus

       Okay mama, bye love you
  I got in the  back seat since Emma is sitting in the passenger seat,  Emma played perfect by Ed Sheeran and we sang along driving to uni

Since it was 1 hour 30 minutes ride we go there fast and there was no traffic , we got down took our bags and read through the school guide  we walked to the school administration office and got our room keys from the old lady sitting behind the table  ,me and Emma are roommates, while Mike has to share with someone he has never met before cool right  they are guys, guys warm up to each other compared to girls, so he will be fine.
Bye girls, Mike said ,you know this sucks I'm going to miss you guys
   Go you woman wrapper  ,I replied shoving my tongue in his face
    We separated, and said goodnight to Mike he room is at the other building
   We got to our room and started work, it was spacious and we had seperate beds which was awesome, we didn't get half ways with the work, I felt my stomach grumbling

   Em, you hungry.
    God,  yes I was thinking the same
, I am starving
Should we order some pizza ,I asked
  Yeah, sure anything will suffice now, Clarie do you think we can finish all this today, cause I am really tired

  I don't think so ,I am exhausted, I think we should just eat and go to bed, then after classes tomorrow  we take care of the rest.

I ordered pizza and wondered how Mike was doing

Hey Em, How do you think Mike is holding up?
She replied shrugging, he should  be fine, he just has issues with new people

Yeah,  pizza got here we ate and talked till we feel asleep 

................
I was on a white bed, everything is white, I was wearing plain white dress  to the bed, it looks like a lab,  someone came in wearing a white lab coat, I tried to see the face but It wasn't clear,i was tied to the bed, the person brought out a syringe and said
'hold still this might hurt a bit'
No, no, no please stop, someone help
Clarie, snap out of it wake up ,Emma screamed
I woke up almost jumpy and sweating profusely

Are you okay, Emma asked looking at me worried
I am fine, I replied breathing hard, we have to get ready for class, are you sure Emma asked again

Yes em, I am fine
I have nightmares, and see all sort of thing in my dream I sometimes wake up having panic attacks , I have gone for therapy ,taken some drugs, but that just suppress it, but doesn't stop it

I got down from the bed went straight to shower , I had class at 8am and this is 7:30, dressed and got ready
,,,,,,
You know its funny how we go through different phases in life, when we are given birth to, when we learn how to crawl, walk, talk then we are glowing sent to sxhool
  We have to pass through kindergarten, nursery, primary, junior and senior secondary school, and here I am in college
This is my first time going to class I am so nervous, I met Mike in the hall
Hey, mike
Hey, baby he replied waving
How was yesterday, hope you didn't run away from your roommate I asked smiling
Very funny, he's actually really cool, oh really, I asked raising my eyebrow ,cool enough for us to know him
Sure, you guys are going to meet Jacob during lunch.
You should really get to class MI lady and stop interrogating me
OK, bye I waved, Emma didn't have class this morning, lucky for her.
I was walking down the hall when I saw class 12 fashion designing.
Well here I go, I took deep breaths, I don't want to end up having a panic attack, that will just be crazy .
When I got in I met  a tall lady, with her hair tied up  ,she faced me immediately I got in.