A Light in the Dark // Flicker Series Part I #wattys2019

Little Things | part I

I wasn't sure 'love' would ever happen for me again, and I wasn't sure if I would even let myself find out.

I went through a time where I couldn't even say that I loved a song on the radio, because I just stayed away from the word entirely. I wasn't event sure I knew what it meant anymore.

I haven't worried about that since I met Niall. I've been so focused on figuring out the moments we're in and not thinking too much about the future. I've wondered what this is, but I haven't even toyed with the idea of labeling it as love.

With that in mind, I think if Niall were to say it to me right now I would say it right back to him without any hesitation.

That's scary, but it also makes me so happy to know that that part of me can remember how to love again.

I wasn't looking for a relationship.

This is unexpected, and honestly pretty inconvenient in terms of a 'normal' relationship...but I tried a normal relationship and it didn't go too well, so maybe inconvenient is exactly what I need. Maybe this is what I need.

I stand up from my seat and walk down the rows to meet him in front of the stage, smiling all the way. He sets his guitar on the stand and hops off the stage, joining me on the ground.

"That was beautiful." I say with a smile as he pulls me into a hug, slightly tucking his head into my shoulder and I feel him take in a deep breath.

This hug feels different. I feel him sigh deeply once his arms are wrapped around me and they linger around me like he doesn't want to let go. It feels like more than just a 'hello' hug and my chest squeezes wondering what's gotten to him.

I'm beginning to assume he's doesn't care about the photo, but I will also mentally beat myself up about it until I hear him say so.

"What are you doing here?" He asks with a smile that has barely left his face since he saw me.

"Uhm...I wanted to see your rehearsals. I hope that's ok?" I smile bashfully, still standing in his arms that haven't let me go.

"You alright?" I ask, slightly pulling my eyebrows together but trying not to let my smile fall.

"Of'course...Um, actually I wanted to talk to you if you've got a second?" He asks as his eyes scan around for a place to have a private conversation.

I nod as he leads me by the hand until we find a spot and sit on top of some equipment boxes backstage, him lifting me up before hopping up himself.

"What's up?" I ask, trying to hide the concern evident in my voice. My mind is racing with ideas of what he could want to talk about and his shift in mood, and very few of them are good.

"Listen I know you're busy with the festival and all, and you probably have some sort of work party or obligations that Beck needs you to go to, but is there any way I could steal you away right after the festival tonight?" He asks, fiddling with the fingers of our entwined hand.

I feel relieved as his request seems more fun, not quite as scary as he's making it seem. I get butterflies at him asking to 'steal me away' tonight and let out a small giggle at his request.

"Well, I promised Beck I would actually make it to the after party tonight and participate because apparently there are some very important industry people coming that I need to mingle with." I start and already see the smile fading on his lips.

"But!" I redeem the hopeful glimmer in his eyes, preparing to propose a compromise. "You can steal me right after your performance is over if you're free?"

Niall smiles widely at my proposed compromise to be 'stolen away' and do whatever he has planned. 

Hmm...wonder what he has planned?

I quickly shake myself out of my thoughts as they were going to a slightly inappropriate place. He's so happy that I said yes, that it makes me happy and butterflies swarm around in my stomach just looking at him.

"It's a deal then! You and me, right here after I perform." He says, putting his right arm around my hips and sliding closer to me on our equipment-box-perch.

He looks around to make sure we're alone before using his left hand to tilt my chin up to him and kiss me.

"I'll meet you here then." I say, my eyes locking into his again. "You need to get back to rehearsals." I whisper, not wanting to break out of this little moment.

He nods, a little smirk playing on his lips as his eyes remain locked with mine and neither of us moving.

He leans in, kissing me again —longer and slower this time as both of us savor every second.

I'm quickly becoming addicted to his lips and I have no idea what i'll do when I can't kiss him every day.

But I don't want to think about that.