Andy's PoV
I ran to the bathroom gagging, i just made it in time for me to throw up in the toilet. Shortly followed by Rye legging it in to the bathroom to see if i was okay. I throw up again, suddenly i feel a hand rubbing my back, i look up to see rye. he smiles at me. i smile back. "i'm sorry" i say sounding disappointed in myself, "why are you apologising?" Rye asked but before i could say anything again, i threw up again. "hey hey hey its okay" i stop throwing up and turn around. Rye gets me a glass of water and a medicine cup full of mouthwash. i wash my mouth out and have a drink. He engulfs me in a hug. We go and sit on Rye's bed. The whole time i was thinking to myself i'm not even ill why am i like this? i keep getting these moments, where i feel sick, can't breathe and feel like i'm going to die, when that happens all i can do is cry. i always thinks something bad is going to happen. i'm scared of practically everything. me and rye fall asleep on his bed.
~The next morning~
Rye was about to go to the gym with the boys, i didn't go because i wasn't feeling up to it. I made Rye go because i can't hold him back from doing everything. "Are you sure i can leave you?" Rye asked me. "Yeah i'll be fine i promise." i said. "right. call me if you need ANYTHING" rye exclaimed. "Yes yes okay i promise" i replied. The boys went to the gym. i rang the doctor to see if i could make an appointment to see what was up with me. they gave me an appointment for 10 minutes time. i walked to the doctors and sat in the waiting room. "Andrew Robert Fowler" the doctor called. i stood up and walked into the doctors room. i sat down. "So Mr Fowler, what can i help you with?" the doctor asked. i explained to him about the moments and the feelings and about my self harm and feeling worthless, etc. "Andrew, i don't know how to put this but you have clinical anxiety and depression" i held myself together and went home. i was home about 5 minutes before the boys. i lay on Harvey's bed crying. i was sharing a room with Rye while harvey was away. i heard the door unlock and Rye walk in to see me in pieces crying. "Hey hey hey what's the matter" he immediately ran over and grabbed me and held me tight. i calmed down a little and felt safe. "I'm sorry" i exclaimed.
"hey don't say sorry" rye said.
"what's the matter?" rye asked rubbing my back. i opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out. "it doesn't matter" i say.
"yes it does andy please" rye said.
"i went to the- the doctors today" i explained. "for what are you okay?" Rye asked. "yeah i'm f- no. i've got anxiety and depression" i explained. Rye said nothing but held me tight. i calmed down and explained to him about the feeling and the moments i have. "it's going to be okay, i'm here for you all the way i promise" rye explained. "thankyou, for everything" i said. "you don't need to thank me" rye said. "sorry" i said. "don't say that either" rye joked. we cuddled in Rye's bed until we fell asleep.
