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The Entire Shrek Script but I Edited it into a Kermit X Garfield Fanfic

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Yes, I actually edited the entire script of Shrek to fit Kermit and Garfield, fight me. I'm this desperate to get some Garfield x Kermit content into the world since it apparently doesn't exist. No more, I won't tolerate it any longer.

#garfield #kermit #trash

Garf 1

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by SauceChildTJ

by SauceChildTJ

GARFIELD:

Once upon a time there was a lovely
princess. But he had an enchantment upon him of a fearful sort which could only be broken by love's first kiss. He was locked away in a castle guarded by a terrible fire-breathing pig. Many brave knights had attempted to free him from this dreadful prison, but none prevailed. He waited in the dragon's keep in the highest room of the tallest tower for his true love and true love's first kiss.
(laughs)
Like that's ever gonna happen. What a load of - (toilet flush)

Allstar - by Smash Mouth begins to play.

Garfield goes about his day. While in a nearby town, the mouse villagers get together to go after the cat.
NIGHT - NEAR GARFIELD'S HOME
MOUSE1

Think it's in there?

MOUSE2

All right. Let's get it!

MOUSE1

Whoa. Hold on. Do you know what that thing can do to you?

MOUSE3

Yeah, it'll grind your bones for it's meal.

Garfield sneaks up behind them and laughs.

GARFIELD:
Yes, well, actually, that would be a wild cat. Now, swamp cats, oh they're much worse. They'll make spaghetti sauce from your freshly peeled tomatoes.
MICE:

No!

GARFIELD: They'll shave your lettuce. Squeeze the jelly from your grapes! Actually, it's quite good on toast.
MOUSE1
Back! Back, beast! Back! I warn ya!
(waves the torch at Garfield.)
Garfield calmly licks his paws and extinguishes the torch. The mice shrink back away from him. Garfield meows very loudly and long and his breath extinguishes all the remaining torches until the mice are in the dark.
GARFIELD:
This is the part where you run away.
(The mice scramble to get away. He laughs.)
And stay out! (looks down and picks up a piece of paper. Reads.)
"Wanted. Comic book characters."(He sighs and throws the paper over his shoulder.)
THE NEXT DAY:
There is a line of comic characters. The head of the mouse guard sits at a table paying people for bringing the comic characters to him. There are cages all around. Some of the people in line are a dog catcher, who is carrying Snoopy in a cage, Mr. Wilson who's carrying Dennis, and a farmer who is carrying the animals from Pearls Before Swine.
MOUSE GUARD:
All right. This one's full. Take it away! Move it along. Come on! Get up!
HEAD MOUSE GUARD:
Next!
ODIE:
Arf arf arf! (Please, don't turn me in. I can change. Please! Give me another chance!)
JON:
(jerks his rope and says nothing)
ODIE:
(Sad dog noise)
HEAD MOUSE GUARD:
Next! What have you got?
MR. WILSON:
This little menace child.
DENNIS:
I'm not a menace. I'm a nice boy.
HEAD MOUSE GUARD:
Five shillings for Dennis the menace. Take him away.
DENNIS:
Mr. Wilson, please! Don't let them do this! Help me!
Mr. Wilson takes the money and walks off. Jon walks up to the table.
HEAD MOUSE GUARD:
Next! What have you got?

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I'm ending this here for now because this is so difficult to do. The website I'm copy pasting this from has some SERIOUS formatting issues and some of the words had links attached to them. Even worse, when I tried to reformat one thing on mobile, it destroyed the entire thing and I had to edit it on my laptop. So, yeah, this is actually something I'm going to try and finish. Goodbye for now.