Apples and Oranges

ch 1

I wake up in a cold sweat again. I glance at the clock and it is 3:18 am. I can hardly get through one night of sleep recently. I keep having dreams that I vaguely remember, but can't seem to place when I wake up. I feel like I'm cursed. I groan and get out of bed to get a snack. Strolling to the kitchen, I stub my toe on the coffee table. Goddamnit.

I stumble into the kitchen searching for something sweet, when something catches my eye. A ripe orange sits on the counter next to the fridge. This orange looks plump and so ripe it seems to be bursting at the seems. I pick up the orange, fondling its tight skin, slightly giving it a squeeze. Yeah, this will do.

I'm going to take some aspirin for my toe first because I banged that bitch hard, so I sit down the orange and down two aspirins.
As I admire the orange whilst reaching to pick it up, I suddenly hear a loud ,"Hey!". I jump back and look around.

Where did that come from? I squat and peer around the cabinet, but no one is around. I slowly get up and reach for the orange again, assuming it was just my vivid 3:30am imagination, but then I hear another loud voice, this time it saying ,"Hey buddy, over here!".

I slowly register it's talking to me, and that the voice is coming from the- wait what? It's coming from the orange? I slowly approach the citrus, picking it up and turning it around to have a face revealed. I lose all ability to speak or think, and I just stare at this abnormality.

"Hi! What's good?" says the fruit casually. That snaps me out of my trance, but I ignore his question. This must be a dream, right? Perhaps I took the wrong pills. This does seem like a dream I would have, having a very similar vibe to the dream I just woke too. But I'm not particularly frightened though. The orange appears to have only eyes and a mouth, but the eyes are hypotonic. I stare in his wide orbs, reveling in the light gray-green combo, like two seas crashing under an overcast day. His mouth is a plush, wet, gaping hole pleading to be filled. Wait what? Reverse that... What I meant is that he has a... big mouth... with teeth that are... straight. The orange looks questioning at me, before opening his... mouth once more.

"Helloooo? Hey! Hi! What's up? I know you can hear me doofus!" says the orange, gazing into my eyes intently. I suppose I might as well say something.

"Uhh, hi... orange?" I hesitantly say, not trying to offend him. The orange lights up at my response, glad to have me respond.

"Oh boy, am I glad you can hear me! First of all, please don't eat me! Second of all, how'd you know my name? And third of all, you're cute," he spouts off, finishing with a loud, long, and grating,"Hahahahaha!". Wow that was a lot to take in, my first impression is that he's kind of annoying. But under that front of being an annoying orange, I can tell he's hiding something. And did he just call me cute? I slightly blush, then remember it a damn orange that I'm talking to. Yeah, this is a real weird dream. I can tell he's really trying to antagonize me with his multiple questions, so I play along.

"Well aren't you annoying? I was kind of planning on eating you sooo, sorry bro," I chuckle, weirdly enjoying his eyes widen in fear.

He quickly responds, "No no no please! Just listen to me. I have a crazy story for you, and I need your help!". Okay, now this is weird. I should just sit Orange back down and go to bed, but I'm already bringing him up the stairs to my room with me. I just have to know what's going on. It's not like it's real, so this is a pretty entertaining dream.

I plop down on my bed and sit Orange on my bedside table, ready for his story. My stomach slightly rumbles and I remember I was trying to get a snack, but it seems rude to eat in front of the orange, but tbh, he's not helping anything. He is still so thick and fresh looking it's almost hard to look at him for too long without my stomach growling.

"Okay, so basically I was stolen from my home," says Orange bluntly."I was just in the store where I lived, with my friend Apple, Pear, and Marshmallow, when all of a sudden, a woman grabbed me and put me in her cart. I was stolen from the one place I've ever lived. My friends and I were screaming at her to stop, but no one in the whole store heard us. In fact, you're the first human who has heard me before," he sadly recites his story, ending with,"So yeah, I was kidnapped. Or I guess you could say fruitnapped. Hahahahahahaha." I could tell he was just trying to liven up the situation. I could tell he was a jokester type, and he seems to depend on comedy as a defense mechanism. But that laugh was dull and off key, and that joke seemed to be not his best work. I suddenly felt the urge to help him. Orange was my favorite fruit after all.

"Okay, I'll help you get back to your friends. In fact, I'll take you first thing in the morning. But I do have a question that's bugging me. Do you know why I'm the only human that can hear you?" I ask, staring into his orbs. He thoughtfully looks up, avoiding my eyes, seeming like he's trying to find the right words to say on the subject.

"How about... we go to bed. I'll tell you in the morning. I think I know the answer, but I need to think about it," he thoughtfully says. I can respect that I suppose.

"Alright, good night Orange."

"Good night... wait I don't even know your name!" says Orange shocked.

"Oh my god, it's Carlos! How did I not tell you that's so rude!" I gasp.

"Hahahaha, well good night Carlos <3"