10. The Truth Comes to Light

1.5K 80 8
                                    

After such an eventful dinner, Hope took up Jonathan's invitation to come for a stroll the following day. As she made her way down the familiar path, she couldn't help but wonder at where her life was seemingly headed.

She was sure Thomas would propose, and it seemed as though he would do so soon. She knew she would reject his offer. It would hurt her father, to be sure, but at the end of the day, she never believed herself to be the marrying kind, even if society would call her a spinster. She may well end up alone, but at least she would be alone and rich.

She knew there was only one man she would consider giving up independence for, and that was the one man that wouldn't force her to give it up. Jonathan knew her, he valued her opinion and ideas far more than most men would value a woman. Sid they, in some happy, alternate life, were married, he would never ask her to sacrifice her will or stifle her thoughts.

But, Jonathan was not to be hers. He was to be Pinkerton's. Of that she was sure. If only she hadn't been so stupid at the ball or so stubborn in the months following. She could have had everything, but she willingly let her ideal life slip between her fingers.

Now she would be Tantalus, always able to see her desire, yet never able to satiate her need. She was sure that watching Jon with someone else would be torture, and yet she knew she couldn't give him up.

Hope was finally broken from her thoughts upon arriving at the Langston's door. After being let in, she made her way to the gardens where she found Jonathan at the entrance.

A smile overcame her friends features upon her arrival, a smile which she gladly returned. It felt so good to be near him, to have him to herself for just a little bit longer. After all, he had been courting Pinkerton for all to long by now, it was to be expected.

They fell into an pleasant conversation, with the topic varying from the blooms to the state of the country. Finally, an easy silence took over, and for once, Hope didn't have the urge to fill it.

Jonathan broke the silence first, and his chosen topic of conversation was both anticipated and shocking. "So," he began "I plan on proposing to Vivianne. I have to ask for her fathers permission if course, but I expect he will approve and we will be married come next spring."

Hope let herself process the words she just heard. He planned on marrying her. She knew he was going to propose but hearing the words from him, the reality truly hit her. It wouldn't be as though she never saw him, but she would no longer be the presence in his life that she was now. She would always come after this woman, after the children they would be sure to have. She would not only lose the love of her life, but her best friend.

She had to have one moment, one moment with him that she could revisit in her mind time and time again when watching him with his wife would become unbearable. Just one moment would be enough. So, Hope squared her shoulders and acted on what she had been denying herself for too long now. Pulling him by the cravat, Hope planted a kiss on her best friend's lips.

It took him no time to react. In seconds he was , moving his lips in time with hers he swiped his tongue across her lower lip, asking for entrance. She immediately granted access, knowing what he wanted by instinct. Hope felt her heart was beating so fast and so violently that it was a wonder her rib cage could contain it. Though she had promised herself that she only needed this one moment, she knew she would always want more, always long for more of Jon.

Finally, after what felt like both an eon and a second, they parted for air, both breathing heavily.

"Jon, I'm so sorry. I— I know you've moved on I shouldn't have done that it's not fair to you." Hope meant what she spoke. Though she wanted Jonathan to herself, she desired his happiness over all else, and if Pinkerton would make him happy, so be it.

"Oh, I— well I thought that— we'll never mind what I thought." Jonathan nervously ran a hand up and down his neck, looking anywhere but his friend.

"You wish to marry Vivianne. I understand that. I won't let my feelings for you keep you from being happy, it's simply not fair to you."

Jonathan's eyes snapped to Hope's at the sound of her voice, and he saw she had a stray tear rolling slowly down her face. He brushed t gently with his thumb before speaking. "Hope—" suddenly, whatever he was about to say broke off as he finally fully processed the meaning of her words. "Wait, what do you mean 'your feelings for me?'"

Hope realized what she let slip. She supposed she would have been more secretive or embarrassed had she not just had her tongue in her best friend's mouth, but as it were, she found she was past embarrassment. "I mean exactly what I said. I have feelings for you Jon, strong feelings. The same feelings you once had for me. I suppose I've had them for a while. Probably my whole life, really. I just, wasn't aware or didn't want to be aware, I don't know. When you told me how you felt that night at the ball, I only realized how I felt until after you had gone. And by then I was foolishly embarrassed and when I wasn't embarrassed anymore more I felt it was too late."

"Better late then never." And with those words, Jonathan swept Hope into his arms once more and pressed his lips against hers for the second time. His hands started lightly at her waist, until they were cupping her face in his hands, keeping her to him.

They stayed like that for some time, enjoying the new discovery of their shared love. They only broke apart for air until finally, Jon rested his forehead on Hope's.

"What does this mean?" Hope asked tentatively. Though she couldn't imagine he'd still propose to Pinkerton, there was still a chance this was out of some sort of pity.

"It means this..." Jonathan knelt down before her, looking into the depths of her eyes that glimmered so finely in the sun. "Hope Edwards, will you marry me?"

For the second time that day, a tear rolled down Hope's cheek, though this time, for an entirely different reason.

****
I've written about half of the epilogue so should be out soon if you're interested

Chasing Hope [COMPLETE]Where stories live. Discover now