Trigger Warning:
The following scene discusses Self-Harm, Sexual Assault and Violence.
If you or anyone you know have suffered from any of these causes, here is a link: https://www.rainn.org/about-national-sexual-assault-telephone-hotline
If you need to skip this part of Saving You, please do so. Also, if you'd like to message me, I am always free to talk!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Saturday came and went, Kendra and I suffered severe wine hangovers. Usually I would have been super pissed about being hungover, but it got me out of making the drive to Stockton State Prison to visit my Dad.
I opted to drive up to the party for this afternoon, it was quiet for the most part - which is odd; for me at least and Kendra noticed.
"Whatcha thinking about?" She asks.
"Honestly? I've zoned out half this drive." I say with a nervous laugh.
"Are you regretting not going yesterday?"
Silence fills the car and I look at Kenz for a moment.
"I don't know. After you brought it up on Friday, it got me thinking some. I just, it's hard to talk to him. He doesn't call anymore, I couldn't even tell you the last time he called me. I get letters twice a year. The Jesse Parker who is inside is not the Jesse Parker who raised me, and that's been a very hard pill to swallow."
"Ever since Briana died, right? That's when the distance got worse?" Kendra asks for confirmation.
"Pretty much." I flatly spit.
It's like once my mom died, my dad wanted nothing to do with me which is what caused me to spiral a little bit. The thoughts of me visiting my dad after my mom had passed, and him breaking the news his sentence was extended...those memories are so vivid. Seeing my dad's ice blue eyes lose the life in them, it killed me. The dad I once knew was slipping away from me, and at that point in my life - at 19 years old, it was fucking traumatizing.
With those memories flooding back, I use my knees to drive for a bit - cruise control is great. While doing so, with these thoughts right there in front of me, I start snapping my ponytail on my wrist.
Without saying a word, Kendra puts her hand on my wrist.
"Aleeah." She says just above a whisper.
Hearing Kendra use my full name snaps me out of my thoughts. I give her a confused look and she then motions to my wrist.
"Shit. Sorry." I say as I shoo her hand away and rotate my wrist and shake it out, as if doing that is going to make the thoughts and urges disappear.
"Never apologize for doing that, okay? I rather you snap the shit out of that ponytail holder than the other option." Kendra tells me as she rubs my arm in a comforting way.
"Thanks, Kenz. Just these stupid flashbacks come and go and it's just..."
"A fucking trigger, Lee, I know - I understand. I just need you to remember you're not alone, not now, not ever. Comprende?"
"Si."
Kendra then puts her hand to her heart and starts to fake cry, "Even just the simple Spanish words you say make my heart so happy. Mi mejor amiga...muy bonita. That's my Lee." She says with a smile, a true Kendra smile which then makes me smile.
Like I've said, I'd be lost without this girl.
Kendra and I made the drive up for Tessa's birthday party in record time, it was a beautiful Sunday drive.
YOU ARE READING
Saving You
Fanfiction"I am safe. I am protected. I don't have to be afraid." Those are the words Leah Parker has heard time and time again since 2014. She was only 21 when she needed this protection, but she's dealing with more chaos since she was 16. Leah never thoug...
