uncontrollable | ethma (e.d & e.c)

-f o u r t e e n-

i woke up to emma, laying next to me. i panic in my head and look around myself. what the hell? i look into her eyes. it was like her eyes were trying to tell me something, but her mouth wasn't moving.

"i don't wanna hide it ethan..."

i take a moment to process what she had said.
she suddenly raises her voice. she sounded raspy, well she always does but like she was extremely exhausted and was tired of me.

"ethan! just tell him already!"

she slaps me on my arm. i freeze with a confused look. i scrunch my eyebrows. what? i watch her get out of my bed. she was wearing a white crop top with adidas black shorts. her hair wrapped into a bun with a yellow scrunchie on top of her head.

i eventually fall back for a little. i could feel someone getting me to wake up. my body was cold which must've meant the comforter had been pulled off.

"emma stop!" i shout, jerking out of the bed. i look to see grayson on my left.

"bro what the fuck?" he gets a little closer to me to see if i was okay. "why did you say that?"

i look over my shoulder to the right. emma wasn't there. no one had been there. it was a dream.

"sorry..." i mumble. my throat hurt too much to talk. i clear my throat. "it's just nothing."

"whatever dude just fucking wake up already." it may have just been me, but he seemed aggressive in his voice.

because i had just woken up, his tone startled me. i take my phone off the charger and hop into the shower.

i shuffle through a few songs on spotify to play. i turn it on full volume. i must've lost track of time because grayson came knocking on the door.

what the hell did he want now?

"what do you need gray.." i groaned, over the sounds of the shower water and music.

"i need fucking toothpaste e," he started. "you didn't buy any yesterday like i told you!"

i honestly thought he was joking. toothpaste, really?
"grayson it's fucking toothpaste just borrow mine!" i yelled back at him.

"well i don't wanna fucking borrow yours!" he replied.

i don't respond back to him for a minute. i could tell his head was against the door.

"fine i'll borrow yours then." i hear the door crack open a bit. he walks in and goes through my cabinet. he takes a look and looks back at where i was.

"um ethan.." he looks down at the floor and pauses. he looks back and grabs what he needed.

"what it's not the right flavor of toothpaste now?" i joke. apparently he didn't find it funny, because he didn't make a sound.

"no that's fine." he says. he takes awhile to answer my question. it looked like he had something to say, but just didn't know how to put it into words.

"what then?" i ask, confused.

he proceeds to talk. "oh nothing." he then walks out of the bathroom, closing the door behind him.